Can You Hear Me Now?

I have been going NUTS trying to get work stuff done, and this next week is going to be even MORE NUTS with the arrival of Rob Szabo today and Peter Katz mid-week, so today I’m taking some time to update before Rob arrives.

Okay, let’s get real here… it’s not like I’m working on taxes 24 hours/day. I’ve just got lots to do, but I’m not able to sit here and work as much as I used to be able to, and need to. I take lots of necessary breaks to sit in my big chair with my feet up, and watch TV or read. And then there is Facebook, with its addictive Scratch and Win and Pull Tabs and Roll up the Brim to Win games that call my name… they’re relaxing, and did I mention addictive? And not hard on my vision like the word games are. But then I can’t sit here forever, and Facebook sucks up time that I should be working, but then I need another break, so I don’t get as much done as I’d like to. And then my favourite musicians come to town, and, well, soon I’m 2 weeks behind. I’m just sayin’.

Not that I mind, however! I will still get everything done that needs to be done by April 30. I know the next few days with Rob here will be a welcome break and God knows I’m thrilled to pieces he’ll be staying with me until Wednesday!! I can’t wait. Just between you and me, though, these guys have got to stop touring out West in April! Heh.

So, I suppose by now you’ve heard about the man who is having a baby. This seems to be upsetting a lot of people. Personally, I cried when I saw that, because I thought it was so great. That this couple can have their very own baby. This couple is very much in love, and that baby will be born into a very loving home, to two parents who really want her. Who cares if the man is carrying the baby?? When he went about his sex change, he consciously decided to keep some girly bits for this exact purpose. His wife can’t get pregnant, so he did. I don’t see anything wrong with that, because I don’t think the ability to carry a child makes you a woman any more than NOT being able to makes you a man. That seems to be the biggest problem with most people. That it’s “not normal”. “Women have a womb. That’s what makes them a woman, their ability to carry a child.” (Quoted from some Christian woman on the news). I couldn’t disagree more, because I have female friends who can’t get pregnant. Either because they were born without the ability, or had a surgical procedure by necessity or choice. And they are NO LESS women because of it. My friend Sylvie has half a womb, among other gynecolgical problems (and MS) and was told she’d most likely never get pregnant, never mind carry a baby full term with half a womb, but she gave birth to a healthy baby boy a couple years ago. Miracle! Any time a child is born into this world it is a miracle. Who cares what body it came from.

That said, is the world ready for this? No, I don’t think so. Not when you listen to the shit that spews out of the mouths of people like Sally “gays are a bigger threat than terrorists” Kern or this Fox News reaction to Heath Ledger’s death (thankfully he has since been fired). People can be so closed minded it boggles my brain. According to a member of my family (who has those attitudes, unfortunately) the Bible says being gay is wrong, and punishable by death. Oh, like this? Well, if that is true, I don’t believe the Bible is the Word of God any more than I believe the Qur’an is. I believe there is one God, and he does not hate. Anyone. Period. (Although I’m sure he has a “special place” reserved for child and animal abusers). I believe he created the Laws of the Universe, but I don’t believe he wrote a book. Because if he did, there would be only ONE book and no wars trying to prove which is the right one. My belief, not yours, I know. My blog, my opinion!

Anyway, I just wanted to have my say about that.

So what else is going on… oh, I stopped seeing my psychologist at the Clinic for Mind/Body Medicine. Partly because I’m so busy this month, and partly because I just don’t need to. How many therapists and psychologists do I need to see, before I realize I don’t need to see one??? This time, she is the one who pointed that out to me. It’s like, give me a call when you’ve weaned off your anti-depressants and need help getting off sleeping pills. Until then, there’s nothing she can tell me that I don’t already know. I ‘ve read all the books and listened to all the CDs and I know how to meditate. I know what I need to do to take better care of myself, and the fact I’m not always doing it is nothing she can help me with, ’cause it’s all in ME. So, yeah. I’m going to my regular doctor next week to get a couple more referrals (I’m hoping to get safer/better walking happening here) and I need a refill on my sleeping pills. I have no idea how I’m going to get off those things. I wish I could fall asleep without them!

Last night I watched the movie Hard Candy with Ellen Page. What an amazing actress that girl is!! That was a pretty tough movie to watch at times, but soooo good. And since I saw Georgia Rule the night before (who got one month free of Movie Central when her Telus TV was installed?? Gee, I don’t know) I think I’ve had my fill of the grown men who think it’s okay to have sex with young teenage girls because they “act older and sexy, like they want it”. *shiver*

Oh, speaking of Telus TV, I am REALLY loving it. If only I could figure out my new remote. And I need to do some furniture re-arranging because all these new channels and on–screen guides involve a lot of reading on screen, which I can’t do with the TV so far away (even with glasses). And since I don’t see myself getting a big screen TV anytime soon, I better move the TV closer. I’ll be putting Rob to work this week! The Shaw Cable guy was a snarky asshole when I called to disconnect their cable. That’s right, Shaw, you lost another customer because Telus TV is offering us a deal you can’t compete with right now. He tried to talk me out of it by scaring me that my “internet will be slower” (which it totally isn’t, if anything it is faster, but that may be because the guy gave me a brand spankin’ new modem to replace the original Telus modem I’ve had since they first came out with DSL in the late 90’s) and that “they make you commit to a 3 year contract to get that one year free”… OHMIGOD. I’ve only had cable for, oh, my entire life, I really don’t see a problem committing to another 3 years. Anyway, we argued for awhile, until I finally said “look, I didn’t call here to argue with you, I called to disconnect”. I understand they are frustrated as I’m sure they are losing customers to Telus, but it’s only going to get worse as Telus TV becomes available in more areas. My brother wants to switch, too, but they don’t have it in his part of the city yet. Both Shaw and Telus now offer all 3 - phone, internet and digital TV/cable. Let the price-slashing war begin!

Anyway, I was about to upload some cute cat pics before signing off, but the move to the new server has put a glitch in that for the time being. So until it’s sorted out, here’s an unedited video clip. I’m off to await the arrivals of my friend Kim and Mr. Szabo!!

Monday night I went to the premiere of “A Mighty Heart” with AH. I think he was the wrong person to take. Let’s face it, he’s a Middle Eastern Arab Muslim. No matter how hot ‘n sexy he is, or kind and helpful he has been to me over the years, added to the fact that he has lived most of his life here in Canada, does not change that… his attitudes are quite different from mine. So when I come out of a movie like that, I’m horrified by what happened to Danny Pearl. When AH comes out of a movie like that, he says “what goes around, comes around.” WTF???

It’s common knowledge that many Muslims (and probably others) believe that “The Jews are responsible for 9/11″. There is this (bullshit rumour, IMO) that “4,000 Jews didn’t show up for work at the World Trade Centre that day because they were warned in advance…” Oh, PLEASE. There were 400-500 Jews killed at the WTC that day, (although the list of those killed does not include their religion, it’s pretty obvious when you see names like Steinman, Berger, Rosenberg, Bernstein, Horwitz, Weinstein, etc.) And are you going to tell me that not ONE of those 4,000 supposedly warned wouldn’t then call their buddies from work, or police, or SOMEONE to advise them of what they’ve been told? Not one in 4,000 is a decent person? Gimme a break.

AH falls into the category of those that believe “the Jews are responsible for 9/11″. That’s like me saying “The Muslims are responsible”. And I would never say that, because I know not all Muslims are bad people. I could say “Al-Qaeda is responsible” just like AH could say “The Israeli government is responsible” if that’s what he wants to believe. Don’t say “Jews” are. Daniel Pearl had NOTHING to do with it, or anything else Israel may be blamed for. He was Jewish by being born into a Jewish family. He was an American. He did not practice his faith religiously, if he did he would have married a nice Jewish girl, not a Cuban. He was a journalist for the Wall Street Journal, looking for answers and truth. He offered his articles to be read by anyone he was going to interview, so they could see what he was writing about, and what his angle was. Daniel Pearl was in love with his wife who was 5-1/2 months pregnant at the time of his death, and he did NOT deserve to die!!!

My biggest problem with arguing about these things with AH, is that I am quite ignorant in the world of politics and the happenings over in the Middle East. AH is not; he grew up in Lebanon surrounded by wars and has lived and breathed it. He has his reasons for hating Israel and I won’t deny that anyone from Lebanon would, knowing a little of that history. He has an intellectual sounding comeback for every argument I put out there because he is far more knowledgeable about world politics and media than I am. For example, when I said “Osama Bin Laden came right out and admitted he is responsible for 9/11!” AH came back with “the media were delivered a tape from Al-Jazeera and they didn’t air it for over a week… because they wanted to edit it to their liking. Don’t you think if it was the real thing, they would have aired it within minutes of receiving it?” And to that I have no answer, because I have no clue whether or not what AH says is true. Because I don’t keep on top of this stuff like he does. Alls I know is, the media has been so ACCURATE and open-minded in its reporting, and George Bush has been so honest about the Whats and Whys.

(That was sarcasm, BTW).

When AH said “well, he wouldn’t have died if he didn’t deserve it. He did something. Good people don’t just get killed for no reason…” I responded with “tell me, again, how your brother died?” (He was killed by two men in Lebanon many years ago). He didn’t say anything after that, point taken.

In closing, I don’t believe “Jews are responsible” and I think generalizing “Jews” into a category like that in the first place is bullshit. Are all “Germans” responsible for what Hitler did? Please. (In all fairness, however, as a friend of mine studying the Middle East at this very moment just pointed out to me, “many people from the Middle East are not necessarily disagreeing or attacking the specific issue - but are putting it in a much wider historical context which does not generally translate well to North American ears…” and that he may not have meant exactly what he said). But still. I don’t like some of the stuff he said, and he clarified it enough that I know he meant what he said.

I rolled all my coins this past weekend. $350!! Not too bad, considering I only started saving the loonies and toonies last September (and have grabbed the odd one out of the vase here and there). It is going right on my credit card to start paying down my trip, and thus another item is crossed off my 101 list. While rolling the coins, I happened across a 1945 dime that is worth about $10.00 and a penny worth about $4.00. Woo hoo!

I’ve been doing some reading lately of websites that have to do with fat acceptance. It is really quite interesting. I’d like to think it’s a bit of a “movement” happening… not a Pro “Eating-whatever-the-hell-you-want-until-you-can’t-get-out-of-your-own-bed” fat acceptance movement, but to accept the fact that some people eat healthy and exercise and will never be thin. That trying to be model-thin is unrealistic for many people no matter how hard they try, and try they do, with diets and creating eating disorders and driving themselves crazy stepping on that damn scale 100 times/day and hating themselves for not looking like Kate Moss. Sites like Big Fat Deal, that I have been reading for awhile now, which led me to the now famous Fat Rant by Joy Nash, and the WONDERFUL, awesome and brilliant Kate Harding. And let’s hear a rousing roar of applause for Mika’s latest single:

That line “no need to fantasize since I was in my braces”? This guy makes that pretty clear. Excellent read, and I thank you, dear Brian, and all the above links, for helping me get closer to the acceptance of myself, and no more diets for me. I know I need to work on the eating healthier overall and regular exercise to just see where my body ends up, but it’s nice to know I’m “allowed” to feel sexy at any size.

Okay, I linked to so much stuff you’ll be reading all night now, so I shall sign off.

I had a really busy week, it was great. On Wednesday, I was visited by my Home Care OT and a sales rep from the medical supply store I deal with, and he installed my stripper pole in the front window. Now I can safely step out and in from my patio doors with something to hold onto. He will be returning soon with another pole for beside my bed, and another grab bar for my shower. He also left me with information on elecronic lift chairs and how to go about getting funding for one. I swear, the recliner I have now is going to break soon, I push and pull on it SO HARD every time I struggle to get up from it. Plus, the cats have clawed it to death so I’d kind of like it replaced with something they don’t recognize so I can train them to NOT claw at it. ‘Cause I CAN train them, you know.

Show times are daily at 3:00, 5:00 and 7:00 pm and involve lots of… um… kitty action.

Pita practices her moves.

On Thursday, I worked at the Pub, although I barely got anything done. I really only had time to organize all the work I’ll be doing when I go back next week. I haven’t been there in awhile, so there was a lot of paper to sort through.

Christine made me a stir fry for lunch, most of which ended up on my white shirt, and my Tide to Go pen didn’t help much. Needless to say, I didn’t feel classy enough to be going to the salon we went to afterwards. Kevin drove Christine and I to Scentorini for our pedicures. It is one of those beautiful, tranquil spas where before your treatment you sit in this comfortable lounge with those BIG armed chairs and sofas and are served coffee or tea while you wait. Because it was my first time there, I had to fill out a bunch of forms about my health, and because filling out forms isn’t something I do anymore without a computer, Christine did the writing for me. She actually wrote “too many to list” when they asked if I’d ever had any accidents or surgeries. We just sat there and laughed as we went over everything that has happened to me over the years. What else can you do?? Christine remembers cooking meals for me and bringing them over after a surgery I had about 12 years ago, and then she did it again this past August, and she has pretty much been around for everything in between.

Anyway, we had our pedicures and it was lovely. Paraffin wax and everything. I also found out, via the girl doing my pedicure who lives near me, that there is a new Nail place in my mall I didn’t know about. It’s tucked away in an area I never go to, and last time I checked it was a hair salon that didn’t do nails. So, YAY, I now have a place next door again where I can get cheap pedicures. ‘Whew.

It was POURING rain, so we had time-called a taxi to pick us up at 4:30 (and it took forever to get through). We sat in their reception area and our cab never showed up. We kept calling, but we couldn’t get through. We ended up having to wait for Kevin to finish up at the Pub so he could pick us up. I was finally home by 6:00.

Shortly after that my mom and Bob arrived, bringing McDonald’s with them because we had all had long days and they just wanted to grab something quick on the way here. I said “get me something, too!” because I was too tired to do anything food-prep wise. Bob returned to Strathmore to face life on his own for two days while I kept my mom. You know, he really doesn’t know what to do without her. It’s kind of sweet, but it’s also kind of annoying for me when the phone rings constantly and it’s him. At one point I yelled “you’ve had her all week! Give me two days!” Heh.

We watched TV (Yay for the Office!) and then went to bed.

The next morning we did a few things around here, and my new duvet arrived, before we headed out for the afternoon. I’m not going to go into great details about what we did, because it involved seeing a psychic/medium/medical intuitive/energy healer type woman, and I know lots of people don’t believe in that stuff and I don’t want to go into it too much here. However, she was amazing, right on about so many things and so many people, and had a lot of interesting things to say about my health. Basically, she confirmed a lot of things that I already knew and believed, but it was nice to hear it from someone else who has never even met me before. Then I went for a biofeedback treatment, and I’m going to go back a couple more times. My health problems, I believe and she confirmed, are mostly caused by my emotional health and things from my past and issues with my Father. (I haven’t spoken to my father in almost 4 years). Although I have disconnected from him physically, I still have a lot of work to do to disconnect from him emotionally. So that is my goal this year, and she said this is MY YEAR. That I will be in much better health once I accomplish that, and I’m 50% there.

Oh there I go, already saying more than I wanted to! Anyway, she was the real deal. She said so many things about me and people in my life that was right on the mark (even AH, she talked about him having been estranged from his son, [and how did she even know he has a son, never mind that he was separated from him?], and that I can trust him as a friend. She said he is trying to be a better person now and needs to be forgiven for his mistakes from the past. Which is so true. And that he has “managing issues” (whether she meant time-management or control-management I don’t know, but she would be right on both accounts!)

This woman put any other psychic-type person I have ever seen to shame. But I still say, even a meeting with a not-so-good psychic is worth more than paying a therapist. You just get so much more out of one visit, they are such intuitive people. You walk out feeling very hopeful about your future and how to make it better. My mom was with me during everything (she was my note-taker, Pat doesn’t record sessions) and gets why I think that now.

I’ll be going for another biofeedback session soon. I want to give it a good three tries before I make up my mind about its benefits.

After all that, mom and I went for a bite to eat at a nearby Vietnamese restaurant and tried to get through to a cab company. It took awhile (it was pouring rain again), but we finally got one and made it home. Flaked out, watched Thank You for Smoking, and went to bed.

Saturday (a beautiful day), we went to our chiropractor and for a quick lunch, then came back here, hopped on our scooters, and headed to the mall. My mom has a mobility scooter too, and it was finally removed from the back of their van so she could use it while visiting me. It’s not possible to talk while shopping when you’re both on scooters, so it’s really more about getting from A to B without hitting people and making sure not to lose the other person. We went to Cotton Ginny (I bought a top, mom bought pants), Wal-Mart, and I showed her the wonderfulness that is Dollarama. She spent $10 and came out with loads of great stuff. All hail Dollarama!

Bob picked her up around 6:00 and they went back to Strathmore. I stayed home and tried to watch Clerks 2, but I couldn’t do it. Sorry Clerks fans, I just couldn’t make it past the first half hour. Yes, Joi, it was worse than the Trailer Park Boys movie. I was in bed by 10:00.

Today, my friend Pam came by to take me for dessert and coffee at Olive Garden. We ended up starting off with a pizza to share before going into the lattes and dessert, because it’s really hard to go to Olive Garden and not eat breadsticks (which come with everything). It was lovely. Afterwards, Pam came back here and put my new duvet into my new duvet cover, so my bedroom is FINALLY complete! We even went to the mall and bought new pillows to fill the shams that came with the duvet cover. My old shams were smaller and the thin pillows I had were fine, but the new shams are a lot bigger and needed bigger pillows! So, the bedroom re-decorating project is now complete:

I can’t wait to sleep there tonight!

Today I finally received the walker carrier for the back of my scooter. Now I need to practice getting my walker on and off that thing, because it’s really hard. I’m weak enough as it is, and with only one good hand/arm, you can imagine it’s not the easiest thing for me to do. The pulleys are really, really tight! It wasn’t even easy for the people who came and installed it for me to do. Good thing I asked Living Well if I could start their March 1 program instead (because I was missing so many classes with all this snow, and the fact I still couldn’t bring my walker over). Now I have a couple weeks to get the routine down.

Here’s the looooooooong story. It took over a month to get that thing! I originally called the medical supply store (the one I am a regular customer with… every piece of equipment I have is from there, and I sent them my scooter to be fixed in December, and you would think I would be on their “special customers” list!!) on Jan. 10. I talked with a man I’ll call Joe. I told him what I needed, and he said they get them specially made by an outside supplier, and it would cost about $175 including delivery. I told him the make/model of my scooter, and asked if they needed to see it. “Oh, no, I know which scooter you have. I will call them and get one made for you and we’ll deliver it when it’s finished”. I told him that if it was at all possible, I needed it by January 19 (for my walking test at Living Well) but if it would cost more to rush it, no worries. He said they should be able to do it by then. I trusted all was well and I would hear from him soon.

A couple weeks went by, and nothing. I called the store, and left a message in Joe’s voice mail, wondering about the status of my equipment. He didn’t call me back. The following week I called again and left another message, and again he didn’t call me back. So last Tuesday I called AGAIN, and this time I refused his voice mail and told the person who answered that I wanted to know where my carrier was, and Joe was not returning my calls. He tracked down Joe, and when he came to the phone he said “oh, yes… that should have been delivered here, it’s around here somewhere, I’ll look into it and get it out to you”. When I still had not heard anything by Monday (this past Monday) I called Joe again and was starting to show my frustration, so he promised me delivery the next day. That afternoon I received a call from a woman I’ll call Sandra, asking if I would be around the next day for a delivery. I told her I needed it in the morning, so I could bring my walker to exercise class in the afternoon.

Sandra arrived Tuesday morning with the equipment, and I showed her to my scooter. She took one look at it and said, “oh, this won’t fit…” the bracket was completely different than the one it would attach to on my scooter. By this point I was ready to scream. I told her how long I had been waiting and about all the ignored phone calls and how Joe was so sure he knew what I needed for my scooter without seeing it. She apologized for Joe’s behaviour and said “well, you’ve got a woman looking after it now. I’ll be sure to get you what you need this week”. She left, I called Living Well to tell them I was missing yet another class, and could I start over on March 1 instead, to give time to sort out the walker carrier situation and for all our snow to hopefully melt.

Sandra called a few hours later. “The kind of carrier your scooter requires needs to be specially made, so we will need to bring your scooter in here”. I said “Joe told me the one I was getting was specially made for my scooter.” She was silent for a moment then said “…uh… I don’t know what to say about that… the one I brought you was the kind we just sell in the store… nothing was specially made… how can that be done without seeing your scooter and fitting it?” “I don’t know, Joe said he knew what I needed and was getting it made. I thought that’s why I waited a month.” “Oh… I’m sorry, I don’t know what to say about that…” You could tell she was stumped and probably wanted to bonk Joe over the head like I do.

She called me back a few minutes later and said she would be by to get my scooter on Thusday morning. She was here, as promised, and only needed to take my seat because that’s where the bracket was. This morning she returned, “with muscle” (a large man) and my specially made walker carrier. (One day!! It took ONE DAY! Fuck you, JOE). They re-attached my seat and showed me how to hang my walker on it, but like I said, it’s no easy feat. I am going to try to do it now so I can take pictures….

I’m back.

The walker carrier on the back of my scooter. $230 it ended up costing, BTW. Having a disability can be very expensive.

With my walker. After a bit of a struggle, I figured out my OWN way to do it, because I am brilliant and think outside the box.

I put those in upside down. That’s all! But you’d be amazed at how many times we tried to do it the “proper” way when Sandra and her co-worker were here. I couldn’t do it myself, and I couldn’t take it off by myself either. They leave, wishing me luck, and that they would call if they thought of an easier way. First try on my own I do this, and voila!

And then when I took it off, I removed the bottom latches instead of the top ones, and it’s as if no one has ever thought of that before. Where there is a will, there is a way.

Now I can take my walker over to the mall even on cold days to walk around. I’ll find some nice person at a store to keep an eye on my scooter for me, and bugger off for awhile. Wheee!

Oh, by the way, I had a nice Valentine’s Day. As a single woman I always try to do something nice for myself rather than simply dread the day and sit at home and cry. Heh. My friend Pam and I went out and I finally got myself the stainless steel pitcher I needed to foam milk for my lattes and then we went to Chapters/Starbucks (there is a Starbucks in the bookstore). We drank lattes and I ate a triple chocolate chunk cookie (because I promised people I would indeed have chocolate on Valentine’s Day, and I can’t let my people down, and I’m off the no wheat thing, at least for now. I’ll explain/make my excuses later). Then we wandered around the bookstore, which unfortunately had the heat up too high, so by that time between the heat and how tired I was (I had worked all day too) I didn’t last long. I did pick myself up a cute prayer book/journal set, with a candle and everything, that comes in a little box with a ribbon. It was only $10 and I want to devote a little time every day to meditation and prayer, so this seemed like a nice little gift to give myself for Valentine’s Day. Oh, and a little box of dark chocolate hearts.

And this brings to a close my week of procrastination. I’m going to head to the mall because I CAN (and couldn’t yesterday with no scooter seat! Oh the horror!) and get more water. Then I am coming home to organize my office, I SWEAR TO GOD. Tomorrow I am getting a pile of work dropped off from two clients, and it’s only going to continue. I must get my office tidy and file my OWN taxes so I can be prepared and organized in my mind and in my home for what is about to begin. Tax season is here!

Yes, I stretched this morning, for all of 7 minutes. Standing up, holding my walker, because I can’t get up off the floor yet without a MAJOR struggle. But if my past attempts tell me anything, it is that even 5 minutes a day will make a big difference in the long run. When I can get up off the floor, that will be a sign that I am improving and it’s back to the water workouts for me. I’m shooting for May…. after the busy work season, and after I’ve given therapy a good chance (which will free up time for going to the pool!). I’ve gone 3 times and I still don’t know why, all I do is talk about stuff I always talk about, on here or to any of my friends. However, I did say I would give it a few months and see how it goes… there may be subtle changes that occur. I think it takes many visits with a therapist before they really get to know me and see through whatever wall I’m holding up that I don’t even realize I am. So far she has said that I am very open and self-aware and I think even she wonders why I’m there.

When I went yesterday, I had a driver I last saw in March. It took me a few minutes to realize who he was, but when he was putting my walker in the back he was singing in Arabic. Then it hit me - “are you Abdul?” “Yes, yes, I am” “You gave me a copy of the Qur’an awhile ago”. Ahh, yes it all came back to him, too. He asked me how I liked it. I told him it was a hard read and it didn’t tell me what I really wanted to know about Islam (the beliefs, in layman’s terms, and stories about Muhammed’s life and what he was like, for example), so I have another book to read about it (no, I haven’t finished reading that one yet either, and it’s back on my shelf with all the other books I have yet to read). He said “that is why I put my number in there! You call me, anytime, 24 hours a day if you have any questions about the beautiful Qur’an. Everything you need to know about anything is in there. Everything!” He went on to say that Muslims don’t want to push their religion on anybody, but “we want everyone to know about Islam. We want everyone to join us in Paradise! On judgement day, it is either the fiery gates of Hell, or Paradise. We want everyone to know about Islam so they can believe in Allah and go to Paradise.” I told him… “everyone does know about Islam; the terrorists have made sure of that.” Heh

Oh, I brought up a line in a passage in the Qur’an that gives “beat her lightly” as the last of 3 steps you take when your wife is “disobedient”. AHEM. His response:

“Oh, it is only in an extreme case, if your wife is unfaithful. First you talk to her and ask her to stop the behaviour. You do everything you can to work it out and make her stop. If she continues, then the ‘beat her lightly’ is actually how you would hit someone if you had a loaf of bread under your arm and didn’t want it to drop… you can’t hit very hard that way. It’s not a beating. And it is more of a public humiliation, because then you will divorce her if she doesn’t change her behaviour. And we all know, the man wins in the divorce. He can go on and find a younger woman and start over… a man can be 90 and still be a man, he can pick a girl up off the street for $100 and still do his thing. Women can’t do that.”

OH.MY.GOD.

Sure, okay, if that is your definition of a MAN! It’s not mine. And, excuse me, the woman is the one having the affair? She’s moving on to her younger man, and taking your money with her. Ha!

Anyway, I held in my desire to freak out all over him in ways he has never heard a Lady speak. I kept it all inside because we were at our destination and I was being set free. I didn’t want to argue with him and his beliefs. I just vented to AH later when I saw him instead. Hehe! He’s more modern in his thinking than Abdul, although there are certainly areas where we disagree when it comes to men and women and marriage.

I’m becoming less and less interested in learning about Islam. It was a curiosity at first, but I hear such conflicting views everywhere I look for information, it’s almost useless. People can twist every verse of the Qur’an to suit their own need. For example, the line “Beat her lightly” (which is from a verse in ‘The Women’ that states “As to those women on whose part you fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (next) refuse to share their beds, and last, beat them (lightly); but if they return to obedience, do not seek against them means (of annoyance”) gives some believers permission to beat their wives when they ‘disobey’. Others (like AH), interpret that to mean it’s the last straw, and divorce is the final option. To be on the safe side, I’m interpreting it to mean “I will not be dating any Muslims in my future”.

I see/talk to so many muslims on a daily basis (AH and Access drivers mostly, plus many live in my building and shop/work in ‘my’ mall), that I started wanting to learn about Islam because of my own ignorance about it. I’ll just read that one book I’ve got on the origins and future of Islam and call it a day.

I think I have spent enough time talking about Islam today. Let’s bitch about something else, shall we?

Like the other day in the post office, I needed to send a package Express Post. I always make a point of printing very clearly marked address labels on my packages, but with Express Post you still need to fill out a to/from waybill. I kindly asked the postal clerk if she would mind doing that for me, because I have “lost the use of my right hand and am unable to write more than my signature on a good day…” As she huffily began filling out the waybill, she asked me WHY I haven’t learned to write with my left hand yet and when exactly I planned to. #$^&$%#$@%

Oh, and tonight on my way home from my little camera lesson there was a car blocking the sidewalk. I was on my scooter and saw someone was in the passenger seat, so I tapped the window and asked him if he was able to move the car so I could get by? He apologized and got out to go to the driver side. PEOPLE, seriously, do NOT block sidewalk entrances and ramps with your vehicles, ever, okay?? Please and thank you.

I watched a few minutes of what used to be my favourite Soap, Days of our Lives, today (I still pop into it once in awhile… 15 years ago I never missed a second of it. Marlena has not aged a day in that time). Baby Claire has been taken (again? I think?) When she comes back in the next few months, I bet she’ll be 8 years old. Then in another month she will be 16. And then she’ll be dating, and then she’ll get married and have her own baby, and all the while her mother will still be 22. (But seriously? Marlena? What is your secret, or who is your surgeon?)

I’m still learning the ins and outs of my camera. I need to get that “zoom” feature down.

No, I did not flip that upside down, Pepper was looking at me from that angle.

Pita has those sad green eyes.

I sat here, trying to think of a title for this post for about half an hour. Seriously not worth it.

You want to know how God works? I love stuff like this.

I’ve recently been meaning to shoot off an email to a client, asking him again (I had asked in October) for the few last things I need to finish up his year end, get his GST return to him, and invoice him for the work. I am down to about my last $50 (not including January’s rent, I have that!) and my bills for December haven’t been paid yet. It was getting down to a real crunch so I needed to get my thoughts organized for this email and hope this client would be willing to pay me even if everything wasn’t 100% finished.

Yesterday, he called me, asking if he could come by and drop off the things I needed. Mind reader! When he showed up, he also had a present for me from him and his wife “for your patience” - a cranberry Body Shop gift set and a $30 gift card for Chapters (which I went online and used that night!) He also requested that I invoice him so he could bring me a cheque ASAP. Cool, no? Now I can pay all my bills and I’ll have a couple more books to add to my reading list. And smell like cranberry.

I love the way life works out. Every time I’m down to my last few bucks, something like that happens. I always have faith that it will, and it always does.

I was chatting recently with my friend who had a baby girl in August (in her car, on the side of the road!) I’ve never known her to be very religious, because she’s never bonked me over the head with a bible, which is a dead giveaway. But I knew she and her family were planning to move to Haiti to help build schools, organized by her church. Then she got pregnant again and plans changed. Anyway, when she wrote: “Yes, baby was born on the side of the road, it was kind of scary yet strangely peaceful at the same time. I knew the Lord was with us and I was not afraid once I gave the situation over to Him. She is a marvelous little person.” I was creeped out for a second. Why? Because she said “I gave the situation over to Him”? I believe in God, so I don’t know why I get uncomfortable when people reference Him like that. I guess I’m afraid the next thing that follows is the bonk on the head with a bible.

Do you know the story about Oprah and when she was told she got the part in The Color Purple? It’s explained in this article. She “gave it up to Him” and look at HER life. Not too shabby. As they say, “let go and let God”. That should be the affirmation I repeat to myself 100 times/day, because I tend to forget. Once in awhile I remind myself “it’s all happening perfectly”, and then the next minute I’m all “WTF… WHY!?!” I try to remember to stand firm in my belief of the Grand Design and one day I’ll know exactly what that is. Heh

I received some awesome news yesterday. Rob Szabo will be back here on April 13 at the Ironwood. Yippeeee!!!

Yesterday I bought some plastic containers to help with the office and bathroom organizing. I worked on the bathroom a bit yesterday, thinking I’d get it all done, but you know what? That’s a bigger job than I thought it would be. I can’t stand for that long! And I don’t know how I’m going to get into the depths of my cabinets since I can’t get myself up from off the floor. Hm. I may need to seek assistance with that project.

I almost cried as I tossed the Estee Lauder toner into the “stuff to get rid of” pile… $29.50 for that, and I used it once… what a freakin’ waste. But I can’t hang on to stuff I know I’ll never use. I have 600 different kinds of lotions and body butters of various scents. I’m not as kind as Robyn, who gives away stuff like that to her readers and pays for the packaging and postage to send it to you. If you want mine, get your arse over here before it all gets tossed!

I also finally heard from the Living Well with a Chronic Condition place, and they sent me a bunch of paperwork. I visit (yet ANOTHER) physiotherapist on January 9, and then my hopeful regular specialized exercise class thingy I'’ve been trying to get into for what seems like forever will finally be underway.

Today someone sent me a video of Saddam’s hanging. “It’s from a cell phone, so it’s a little grainy”. Well, I’m not going to watch it ANYWAY, so I don’t care how grainy it is. I can’t believe people are sending that around. I mean, I believe it I guess, some people are pretty sick, but why they would think I would want to watch it is beyond me. Yeah, the man was slime, but so are a lot of people, and I’m not going to get any great high or sense of justice out of watching them, or anyone, die. It’s all a part of that Grand Design thingy, whether it makes sense to us now or not.

Yesterday I went to the dentist. Well, actually, my Periodontist, who I go to every 5 months. My gums are in rough shape, but so far we have been able to keep surgery at bay. It’s difficult to floss and take care of your gums properly with one hand, you know! So I count on my Sonicare to do the work. Of course, when I was staying in the care facility and had NO useful hands, the nurses brushed my teeth for me, and they didn’t like the Sonicaire. It’s hard enough to brush someone else’s teeth, never mind with a fancy motorized brush. So we used a regular one, and didn’t do a very good job. And it showed on this visit, but hopefully by the time I go again after 5 months of Sonicaring (I made a word!), they’ll look better.

But I digress. I was sitting in the waiting room wearing my cute strappy comfy shoes that I bought in Montreal, and there was a woman next to me with the exact same shoes! We talked about how comfortable they are and how much we love them. She told me she bought hers at a specialty shop in Eau Claire Market. I told her I found mine in Montreal, but I didn’t tell her what they cost me, because if she bought hers at Eau Claire Market she spent 5 times what I did. HA!

Naomi, the sweet woman with the pointy instruments that scales my gums, took me to her chair and asked me how I was doing. I mentioned I’d had a hell of a summer, spending a lot of it in the hospital and stuff. She asked, “oh, is that when you broke your wrist?” to which my response was a dumbfounded look. Turns out she spent a good hour and a half reading my blog one night about a month ago. I forgot I had given her the address last time so she could see pictures of my cats! She had never seen a blog before. It’s weird to try to explain it to people who don’t have one or read them regularly… yes, there are millions of us who go online and write about our lives and publish it on the internet for the whole world to see. Yeah, so?

Anyway, my periodontist is a few blocks away from where my brother lives. He came and met me there so he could hitch a ride with Access back to my place, for his weekly visit, vacuuming, shopping, dinner, etc. He noticed a big spot on the rug beside my couch, and said “oh-oh, I think the cats pee’d on your rug!” Nope, the day before my latte was sitting innocently on the side table waiting for me to drink it when Pita decided to knock it on the carpet while oh-so-daintily walking across the table. I saved most of the latte, but the big spot remained. So Darren got on his hands and knees and scrubbed it out! It worked so well, I pointed out that months prior I had fallen with a latte in my hand and there was another big spot on the rug being covered by a plant pot. So he scrubbed that too, and it’s gone! Amazing what a little elbow grease can do. Now if he would just do ALL of my apartment like that… I’ve been here 3-1/2 years, my rugs could use a good shampooing.

We went for dinner and then shopping. I found some things I needed at Dollarama that I didn’t think I would find there. Everything is a dollar. That includes those hooks that hang over the back of your bedroom or bathroom door, with, like, 7 hooks, that Walmart had for $10.96 and Dollarama had for… ONE DOLLAR. Everything is a dollar.

I was flipping channels the other night, and I stopped for a few minutes on the Head of the Canadian Society of Muslims or something. He was talking about this being the month of Ramadan, during which time Muslims are to be their most giving and charitable, helping those in need wherever possible. It is also the time when they fast during the daylight hours, and when the sun sets they “break fast” and have this whole ritual of prayer and food (AH always knows the exact time… “tonight we eat at 6:57″). This man said that Muslims are to open their doors to non-Muslims, invite them to break fast with them, and share their homes, families and food with them. Last night I called AH and left a message that he is supposed to A) give me money, and B) invite me over to his house to meet his entire family and break fast with them. I haven’t heard back…

Pita saw a little bug on the ceiling and was going nuts, so Darren brought her closer.

I’m gonna getcha!

Yeah, let her eat bugs. I’ll sit here and be the Classy AristoCat.

Today is… cloudy and dreary and very rainy and very cool… and I feel SO GOOD. I feel human! My windows are open and it’s cool in my apartment. I am walking around here sometimes with just my cane, and I don’t feel like I am going to fall with every step. I’ll be out of here when the forecasted snow falls by the weekend, though. No snow in Montreal’s forecast! Haha!

You may think I have lost my love for the sun, but you would be wrong. It’s just temporary, I am sure of it! I’m getting better every day and eventually the mild heat won’t affect me quite to the extent it does now. Of course by then it will be winter, but whatever. I still love sunflowers. I’m sitting here drinking a cup of coffee out of a pretty mug with a sunflower on it. I have no idea how that ended up in my possession yesterday, I really don’t!

Yesterday my brother came over again, late in the afternoon. I was pre-occupied, typing away in my office on my last entry. As he was approaching my patio doors, I heard him from outside: “Donna! Did you know your cats are outside??” WHAT?!? They were out on the grass right beside my patio, just sitting there watching everything. I was freaked. I guess they figured out how to open the screen door, so now I am going to have to be very careful that it’s pushed in hard and get some sort of a lock on it as well. If I can get a lock for that type of sliding screen door! Anyway, they didn’t go far, and as soon as my brother arrived they came right back inside without any cajoling, but now they know the life beyond the screen door they have been watching is real, and it includes grass. This could pose a problem.

I am so lucky my brother arrived when he did. I don’t even want to think about what could have happened.

So Darren was here, and he once again vacuumed like a *superstar* (man, he is GOOD at that) and took out my garbage and stuff. Then I took him for dinner. He asked me how I was going to handle my suitcase and get to the airport in the morning, and I said “balance my suitcase on my walker and take a cab. I’ve done it many times before”. He said “you’re not going to be able to do that easily now, why don’t I come meet you and help?” “At 4:00 a.m.?” Gulp. Hehe. So, he decided he is going to come over tonight and spend the night so he can get up early with me and help me get to the airport in the cab. Then I’ll give him cab fare to get home. That is SO AWESOME of him! Because I have to be at the airport by 4:30 a.m., I didn’t have the heart to ask anyone I know for a ride and help. So, you know, whew! I actually was a little worried about doing it alone.

I’ve been talking with AH a lot the past couple days, making up for lost time while he was away in BC for the past 10 days. I missed him! He is just starting to realize how *hot* he is. Apparently some other ladies he drives regularly have been telling him, and one older woman he drives pointed to a few young girls outside her house and said “see those girls? They think you are SO hot and want to meet you.” They came over and were all giggly, “hiiiii!” So now I always ask him, “has anyone told you you’re hot yet today?” He says he doesn’t want it to go to his head. It totally won’t, he is far too humble. But he IS “the hot driver” and I said it first!!

I asked him again about that that John guy he told me about months ago, and he said “oh yeah! I haven’t seen him! I think he’s moved away or something.” He said the last time he drove him, it was from Church. He was seriously getting into the whole going-to-church-thing. So, that’s not really my thing, so probably just as well.

I am, by the way, still in my own learning process though, trying to learn about and understand religions, specifically Islam because it’s so misunderstood. I finished reading the Qur’an and am right now reading a book about the history of Islam that is much easier to understand than the Qur’an. And I will tell you, there is a lot of misunderstanding out there about Muslims and the Prophet Muhammad and what he wanted Islam to be about and how other people have messed with it in their interpretations. It’s quite fascinating, really. I guess Catholics have a Pope and Buddhists have a Dali Lama, but Islam doesn’t have a Leader like that who would have the final word about something in the Qur’an. So there are many Muslims interpreting parts of the Qur’an to work to their advantage, to suppress women and justify suicide bombings, whereas others interpret the same revelation to mean empowerment for women, forgiveness and peace. AH asked me yesterday if I had ever heard that Islam states something like “if your neighbour isn’t a Muslim, kill them” and I said yeah, pretty much. He was shocked because someone just told him the other day that was in the Qur’an, and it was the first he had ever heard of it. And he was raised on that book. My translated copy has verses I have read translated differently by other people, so it’s very frustrating. Those trying to justify killing also take just a snippet of the verse to do so - this article explains that.

I want to make it clear I am not for or against any particular religion, just interested in learning, especially with all the fear out there right now. However, that said, I will not be bringing my book about the history of Islam in my carry on luggage to read on the plane!

Anyway, I need to get some work done here today (now that my office is cool! Woo hoo!) get to the mall and return something, and finish up packing and getting ready to go to Montreal. Emma, Lobelia, Lindy and Rob, I’m coming to hug you alllllll!!

I’ll be back next week with all my stories and pictures!