Can You Hear Me Now?

Yes, I stretched this morning, for all of 7 minutes. Standing up, holding my walker, because I can’t get up off the floor yet without a MAJOR struggle. But if my past attempts tell me anything, it is that even 5 minutes a day will make a big difference in the long run. When I can get up off the floor, that will be a sign that I am improving and it’s back to the water workouts for me. I’m shooting for May…. after the busy work season, and after I’ve given therapy a good chance (which will free up time for going to the pool!). I’ve gone 3 times and I still don’t know why, all I do is talk about stuff I always talk about, on here or to any of my friends. However, I did say I would give it a few months and see how it goes… there may be subtle changes that occur. I think it takes many visits with a therapist before they really get to know me and see through whatever wall I’m holding up that I don’t even realize I am. So far she has said that I am very open and self-aware and I think even she wonders why I’m there.

When I went yesterday, I had a driver I last saw in March. It took me a few minutes to realize who he was, but when he was putting my walker in the back he was singing in Arabic. Then it hit me - “are you Abdul?” “Yes, yes, I am” “You gave me a copy of the Qur’an awhile ago”. Ahh, yes it all came back to him, too. He asked me how I liked it. I told him it was a hard read and it didn’t tell me what I really wanted to know about Islam (the beliefs, in layman’s terms, and stories about Muhammed’s life and what he was like, for example), so I have another book to read about it (no, I haven’t finished reading that one yet either, and it’s back on my shelf with all the other books I have yet to read). He said “that is why I put my number in there! You call me, anytime, 24 hours a day if you have any questions about the beautiful Qur’an. Everything you need to know about anything is in there. Everything!” He went on to say that Muslims don’t want to push their religion on anybody, but “we want everyone to know about Islam. We want everyone to join us in Paradise! On judgement day, it is either the fiery gates of Hell, or Paradise. We want everyone to know about Islam so they can believe in Allah and go to Paradise.” I told him… “everyone does know about Islam; the terrorists have made sure of that.” Heh

Oh, I brought up a line in a passage in the Qur’an that gives “beat her lightly” as the last of 3 steps you take when your wife is “disobedient”. AHEM. His response:

“Oh, it is only in an extreme case, if your wife is unfaithful. First you talk to her and ask her to stop the behaviour. You do everything you can to work it out and make her stop. If she continues, then the ‘beat her lightly’ is actually how you would hit someone if you had a loaf of bread under your arm and didn’t want it to drop… you can’t hit very hard that way. It’s not a beating. And it is more of a public humiliation, because then you will divorce her if she doesn’t change her behaviour. And we all know, the man wins in the divorce. He can go on and find a younger woman and start over… a man can be 90 and still be a man, he can pick a girl up off the street for $100 and still do his thing. Women can’t do that.”

OH.MY.GOD.

Sure, okay, if that is your definition of a MAN! It’s not mine. And, excuse me, the woman is the one having the affair? She’s moving on to her younger man, and taking your money with her. Ha!

Anyway, I held in my desire to freak out all over him in ways he has never heard a Lady speak. I kept it all inside because we were at our destination and I was being set free. I didn’t want to argue with him and his beliefs. I just vented to AH later when I saw him instead. Hehe! He’s more modern in his thinking than Abdul, although there are certainly areas where we disagree when it comes to men and women and marriage.

I’m becoming less and less interested in learning about Islam. It was a curiosity at first, but I hear such conflicting views everywhere I look for information, it’s almost useless. People can twist every verse of the Qur’an to suit their own need. For example, the line “Beat her lightly” (which is from a verse in ‘The Women’ that states “As to those women on whose part you fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (next) refuse to share their beds, and last, beat them (lightly); but if they return to obedience, do not seek against them means (of annoyance”) gives some believers permission to beat their wives when they ‘disobey’. Others (like AH), interpret that to mean it’s the last straw, and divorce is the final option. To be on the safe side, I’m interpreting it to mean “I will not be dating any Muslims in my future”.

I see/talk to so many muslims on a daily basis (AH and Access drivers mostly, plus many live in my building and shop/work in ‘my’ mall), that I started wanting to learn about Islam because of my own ignorance about it. I’ll just read that one book I’ve got on the origins and future of Islam and call it a day.

I think I have spent enough time talking about Islam today. Let’s bitch about something else, shall we?

Like the other day in the post office, I needed to send a package Express Post. I always make a point of printing very clearly marked address labels on my packages, but with Express Post you still need to fill out a to/from waybill. I kindly asked the postal clerk if she would mind doing that for me, because I have “lost the use of my right hand and am unable to write more than my signature on a good day…” As she huffily began filling out the waybill, she asked me WHY I haven’t learned to write with my left hand yet and when exactly I planned to. #$^&$%#$@%

Oh, and tonight on my way home from my little camera lesson there was a car blocking the sidewalk. I was on my scooter and saw someone was in the passenger seat, so I tapped the window and asked him if he was able to move the car so I could get by? He apologized and got out to go to the driver side. PEOPLE, seriously, do NOT block sidewalk entrances and ramps with your vehicles, ever, okay?? Please and thank you.

I watched a few minutes of what used to be my favourite Soap, Days of our Lives, today (I still pop into it once in awhile… 15 years ago I never missed a second of it. Marlena has not aged a day in that time). Baby Claire has been taken (again? I think?) When she comes back in the next few months, I bet she’ll be 8 years old. Then in another month she will be 16. And then she’ll be dating, and then she’ll get married and have her own baby, and all the while her mother will still be 22. (But seriously? Marlena? What is your secret, or who is your surgeon?)

I’m still learning the ins and outs of my camera. I need to get that “zoom” feature down.

No, I did not flip that upside down, Pepper was looking at me from that angle.

Pita has those sad green eyes.

I sat here, trying to think of a title for this post for about half an hour. Seriously not worth it.

Christmas continued at my mom’s house with my Stepdad. It was very peaceful! No cats running amuck and tearing up the hall. We decided to open all our gifts on Christmas Eve, because it’s so nice to do it by the light of the tree and candles. And the fireplace DVD I gave my mom and Bob that turns your TV into a fireplace… I need to get one of those now, it is seriously relaxing.

So after we ate chili and cornbread, we got a glass of wine and opened presents. Of course, I had already received my BIG present of the digital camera, but I still had lots to open. My stocking filled with my favourite shower gels and lotions and magazines, the Spin Spa I had been begging for, a cordless kettle, a coat rack (for the corner of my bedroom because I’m not so good at hanging up clothes) and a couple pairs of casual pants and tops. I gave my mom a couple sweaters and Nora Ephron’s book she had been wanting, and my Stepdad got pants and tops from me. My mom and Bob gave each other some really nice things. My mom got a snuggly that I am now DYING for myself!!

Must.Have.Avon.Snuggly.

Anyway, we all went to bed fairly early because we are party animals.

Christmas morning we slept in and then Bob made us a big breakfast, with the fluffiest omelet known to mankind, wheat free pancakes and bacon. He even brewed me up some French Vanilla flavoured coffee. I spent a good portion of the day snuggled up in my mom’s La-Z-Boy by the TV fireplace, reading. None of us are in the greatest of health, so going for a walk or a drive just isn’t something we could do. We had a nice supper, and mom made this delicious apple crisp without any wheat or sugar for dessert. I mostly stuck to my food regimen… I did have a couple raisin cookies and some candy-coated nuts, which I paid for in dizzy spells and tiredness.

So that was Christmas, in a nutshell! I know, my family is so exciting. Hope you all had a good one!

Today I made up a big list of 101 things I want to do within 1001 days. I made it a permanent page in this blog so I can keep track and read it every day. They say if you write down your goals and read it often, you have a better chance of achieving them. Anyway, I grouped them into categories, but other than that they are in no particular order. You can read it RIGHT HERE (or the link is at the bottom of my categories in the side bar).

I was flipping channels earlier, and stopped for a moment on an interview with Ralph Klein. For those of you that aren’t from around here, he was the Premier of Alberta forever (Mayor of Calgary before that, forever) and retired last week or something. Anyway, the interviewer asked him about his thoughts on same sex marriage, and he responded that he does not believe in it. That the Institution of Marriage should be between a man and a woman. That “The Institution of Marriage is sacred, and should only be between a man and a woman” and I almost spit out my latte. SACRED?? Don’t go telling me that same sex marriage shouldn’t be allowed because marriage is sacred. You can have two people of the same sex, who have been in a committed relationship for 20 years, and you don’t think they should be married, but you will allow a drunken couple to get married on a whim one weekend while in Vegas, and then get divorced when they come home? (I’m looking at you, Britney). You allow young people who don’t know any better to marry and start pumping out babies, just to get divorced 2 years later and leave the kids at home while they go out and party (I’m looking at you, Britney), yet the boring same sex couple who stay at home to raise their adopted babies and take their roles as partners and parents seriously, aren’t allowed to? You allow people to marry and divorce 6, 7, 8 or more times? You will allow a man to marry a woman and turn her into his property, controlling her, not allowing her freedom to visit her friends or family or go to work, yet you won’t let that same sex couple who respect, value and cherish each other completely to marry? Enough straight people have already made a mockery of marriage and that “sacred” union with all their affairs and dumb decisions (I’m looking at you, most celebrities, and that woman-I-know-and-don’t-like who has been dating a married man for years) so why can’t gay people? It’s ridiculous.

At this point Gay Marriage is legal in this country, but it seems to be a never ending issue. Many politicians still want that law retracted, and I just don’t get it. No one should be telling anyone who they can or can’t love and be with. (Unless that person is already with someone else, then HANDS OFF!) Just my two cents.

When can kitties get married?

Mmmm I smell like vanilla candy. I love Rock Star soap. (Oh, geez… I went over to Lush to get that link and then I end up staying over there forever, finding more things I want!)

I have been having strange dreams lately. One of them involved Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie, AND Johnny Depp all being over to watch a hockey game. We were in the house I grew up in, and I remember Angelina asking me to make her a toasted bacon and tomato sandwich (”just half of one”) and to serve it on a plate with little pastries. I had chips and salsa out for everyone (there were lots of people) and the salsa dish I gave Brangelina was too deep (like a jam jar, you can’t get a chip into that) so I was digging through the cupboards looking for a better one while trying not to overfry the bacon, and find the “perfect” pastries from the stash in the fridge. Angelina was laughing at me because I was falling over myself trying to be the perfect hostess and she commented to Brad that I would make a great personal assistant to them. I remember thinking “not on your life!” Then people started breaking into the house that were out to kidnap Angelina for some reason (it had to do with her good work over in all those third world countries though, obviously they don’t appreciate it) so the focus turned to hiding Brangelina and everyone was running all over what was now this huge mansion of a house, looking for places to hide. Oh, and Johnny Depp? He just appeared to do a little dance before the hockey game started, then took his seat. Seriously. A stupid little dance in the middle of the living room.

Hm.

I’m not doing any of my usual Christmas baking this year. I just don’t want to be around it, and there is NO WAY I can bake without “testing” some. Sorry, fans of My Infamous Shortbread™ Cookies. There won’t be any this year… I don’t think rice flour and vegan butter-like product would cut it.

You know what I hate? When you’re having a discussion with someone about a certain topic, and that person wasn’t listening or getting what you were saying, and starts stressing a different view that’s not exactly related to the point you were making in the first place, and a little argument begins, and you say “I’m not arguing about this.” And they say, “I’m not arguing!” and keep going. You say, “can we just drop this, please?” and they say, yeah, fine, and then keep going. You sigh a deep sigh, and say “I said I don’t want to argue about it.” “I’m not arguing, blah blah blah I’m right, blah blah blah.” “Can we JUST DROP IT NOW, please, I’m not doing this.” “Yeah, it’s not worth arguing about. But, blah blah blah I’m right blah blah blah.” SHUT. IT. I don’t need you to send me a fucking link.

Ahhhh, day three of my new food plan. I’ll know it’s become a lifestyle habit when I stop counting how many days I’ve been doing it, and talking about it in here. So far, so good. My nose has stopped running and the sniffles are gone as of today, but I’m still feeling stiff and sore. It’s all a part of sugar withdrawal, it’s a bloody drug. I’ve got another delivery from the organic whole foods place this week, because, apparently, fresh vegetables don’t last two weeks. I’m even getting some Indian food this time… spinach & mustard greens and chickpeas with potato & onion. They’re in cans, so, you know, that’s my kind of meal preparation. And a jar of their mayonnaise, because what I’ve got in my fridge contains sugar. Just skimming this list is enough to keep me off the stuff and get excited about my sugar-free future health. I’ve got to be carefel though, ’cause sugar is everywhere.

I am officially in the music business. Sort of. Rob has asked me to handle all his promo from now on, and he will pay me for it. I am also working my butt off trying to get him and Peter a show in Calgary for November 11. I guess there was a mix-up with agents/managers and nothing for their Western tour was actually booked in advance, so they’ve been scrambling around trying to do it themselves. I offered to book Calgary, because I’m here and I know the live music venues in the city. However, it is short notice and that is a holiday long weekend, so it’s not easy. I have spent hours on the phone and e-mailing places… if they had to pay me my hourly bookkeeping rate for this, they would owe me more than they’ll be making at their show!

Anyway, I’m working on it and there are a couple possibilities. I’m sure they will buy me a beer for my trouble, although everyone knows I’m glad to do it for nothing!! The sad part for me is that they are in Edmonton on November 10 and Grande Prairie on the 12th, so there will be no hanging out with Donna for a couple days this time. That’s the rock ‘n roll lifestyle for ya. Rob says, “hey, I’m just doing my rock n’ roll duty” and when I came back with “creating a buzz, buzz, buzz…” he was quite pleased. “I say that to so many people and they don’t get it!” Heh.

Oh, and add to that I’m helping Terra Hazelton with her website updates for which she is sending me chocolates from Switzerland. She’s in Europe right now. Score!

Yesterday in the mall I saw an Amish woman filling out an application for a credit card. WTF??

You may or may not have noticed down the right side of my page I have added a section of links called “Fellow MSers”. I didn’t start this blog to be about MS or anything, but since it is something that affects my life so much, it comes up and everyone knows I have it. Anyway, I’m not a member of any “MS Community” online and any time I have joined a group, via Yahoo or something, I have left shortly afterwards for reasons I won’t get into, I guess I just see things a little differently. Anyway, Sylvie and Maggie are friends I met online because of their AWESOME attitudes (Sylvie doesn’t update often, but she keeps an amazing site here), mdmhvonpa has been reading my blog and commenting for awhile and he has a lot of links to other MS stuff if you are looking for that. As does Charles, whom I don’t know, but he links to me and has an MS blog that offers podcasts. Of which I am totally out of the loop on, but I’m sure they’re great and beneficial to others out there. I e-mailed mdmhvonpa once to find out more about him and to be friendly, but he never responded. I’m not sure if that is because he (or you, as I know you’re reading!) didn’t receive it, or is trying to keep a mystery-man aura about him.

I’m taking Pita and Pepper to be spayed next week. I know it should have been done by now, but I’ve had other things to worry about. They’re not in heat yet, so at least I’ve got that going for me. AH is going to drive me to take them in on Thursday night, and then my parents and I will pick them up on Friday after the chiropractor. I have no way to get them there Friday morning, so I need to bring them in the night before. At least there is no extra cost for that. Except my PAIN of living without them for 24 hours and worrying myself silly.

Oh, I need to complain about that Silvert’s online store. Scratch anything good I have ever said about them. Yesterday I received my second order; I had added a dress I liked to this order, and they sent me the wrong one. I have this grossly bright purple dress with big bright flowers on it. Not to be worn by a woman under 80. Which, of course, may be expected because they are mainly a senior’s clothing store. But I had picked a white one with little blue flowers that I thought was cute. Then I went to try on the bra, and they sent the wrong bra too! I had ordered the velcro one and they sent one with about 10 little hooks in the front. Useless to me. What a waste of my time and money, now I have to send everything back. I e-mailed them to find out how I can go about sending it back collect and ensure my refund, seeing as they’re the ones who screwed up. Normally you pay the shipping on returns, but screw that.

A few years ago there was a big mix-up on some lingerie I ordered online. To apologize for their error and make up for the hassle, they sent me a free pair of red frilly crotchless undies. I laughed my ass off. And I’m sure I still have them somewhere.

Okay, well, my brother is supposed to be here soon. That means I’m going SHOPPING! See ya.

Ooooooh…. that dinner looks WAY better than mine!

Hellew??

Helloooooerrrr?! Who’s there??

• Normal people come home from one hospital and stay there; I head to another one the same day.
• Normal people get painkillers like morphine or demerol or at the very least something with codeine to help them control pain after surgery; I am on a medication I chose to treat my MS that I recently discovered blocks narcotics, so I simply had/have to suffer through the pain. Advil can’t do much for you in these situations.
• Read that again. SO.NOT.FUN.
• Normal people have veins that are easily found and punctured for giving blood and IVs; I have veins that either can’t be found, collapse or jump away from needles for whatever reason. Four nurses making several pokes each and the IV was finally inserted, just to have my hand turn into a balloon by the next day because it couldn’t take it. We won’t even discuss the daily blood withdrawals for the lab and the bruises left behind.
• Normal people have gallbladder removal surgery these days and it is a fairly simple laparoscopic procedure that takes about an hour, and they can leave the next day; I had a “very messy” gallbladder that required more cutting and work and was in surgery for several hours, and needed to stay in the hospital for a week.

It’s nice to be considered special by the doctors and all that, however I would rather be on the easy side of that “special case”. Add my MS symptoms and a healing broken wrist into that mix and I do believe I had more nurses shaking their heads in disbelief…

Anyway, it’s been a tough few days. I’m at my mom’s recovering now and hopefully this will all be over soon and I can get home for REAL and enjoy my kitties who are almost CATS and Rob Szabo’s arrival for his show August 11. BTW vote for Rob’s “Breaking Even” video, he broke the Top 10 the other day - Click Here and scroll down the page.

Thanks for all your well wishes and thoughts, I’ll check back soon with a real entry. My last few days at the care facility were nice and Shawna being here right at that time was a Godsend, so I’d like to talk about that more. For now, it’s back to the La-Z-Boy.

I am going to end up marrying a Muslim Access cab driver. I am quite sure of this, as they seem to be the only men I meet and they ALL LOVE ME.

My mind has been spinning for the past 24 hours, so you’ll have to bear with me during this long entry. If you want. You don’t have to. But I hope you do.

Fascinating evening I had last night. I went to see Lieutenant General Romeo Dallaire speak up at the University. He is a highly decorated war hero who served in Rwanda in 1993 as a UN Force Commander (apparently Nick Nolte’s character in Hotel Rwanda was loosely based on him). He has written a best-selling book, which is also a documentary, and in 2007 is being made into a feature film - “Shake Hands with the Devil: The Failure of Humanity in Rwanda“. I bought the book when I arrived, hoping to meet him at the book signing afterwards, and it’s almost 600 friggin’ pages. Perhaps I will wait for the movie…

Anyway, I also had interesting Access drivers last night so I’ll talk about that first before I get into the Romeo stuff. The driver that took me to the university was a driver I have had a couple times before. He loveslovesloves me, especially my one dimple, and does not hesitate to tell me how beautiful, pretty, sweet etc. I am. He asked how I have been (I haven’t seen him for probably 6 months) and I said I was quite stressed these days with work. He said “pretty girls like you should never be stressed”. Heh. He asked if anyone was yet the proud keeper of my dimple, and I said no, I’m still single, and he siiiiiiighhhhed. Then he started talking about attraction and the “vibe” and what he likes in a woman, and I got a little uncomfortable (the feeling is far from mutual), so I tried to change the subject to talk about who I was going to see. Somehow religion came into it and upon learning he was Muslim (as 90% of the drivers are, it seems), I mentioned that I have a friend who is Muslim (AH) and have been learning bits and pieces about Islam and the culture, and how interesting it is (even if I don’t agree with it all and am not an organized-religion kind of person). He asked me, “has he given you a copy of the Qur’an?”. Hmmm. No, that had never even crossed my mind!

On the way home, I was driven by another Muslim. There was also a young developmentally disabled girl in the back seat he was driving home, and she was very restless and noisy. He told me he had been quoting from the Qur’an to her earlier and it seemed to calm her down, as he pointed to a book. I said “is that the Qur’an?” and he said yes, so I asked to look at it, but he said it is in Arabic. “Do you want to see an English one?” I said “sure, if you’ve got one” and he said “of course, I will give you one when I get you home”. I said “Give? As in GIVE? To keep?” and he said of course. I told him it was funny that I was getting one from him tonight, because I had mentioned to my driver earlier that I have a Muslim friend and he had asked if he has given me a copy of the Qur’an, and now here I am getting one. He said “oh, you have a Muslim friend? Does he pray? Because if he prays, he is an honest man and you can trust him”. I said as far as I know, he told me he attends prayer “when he has time” (which I bet isn’t very often, he’s not the most practicing of Muslims. Obviously, I have certainly been privy to some non-Muslim behaviour coming from him!) He shook his head in a “tsk, tsk” fashion and said “if he only prays when he has time, then he is only honest when he has time”. And I laughed my ass off, because, I tell you, that is probably the most perfect description of AH I have ever heard.

True to his word, when he dropped me off he gave me a copy of an English translated Qur’an and he made sure to put his name and phone number in the front of it as well. So now my reading list is really filling up, as is my list of Access drivers that like me. Not that I actually keep one, but if I did, it would be quite long. If only they all looked like AH!

Anyway, back to Romeo Dallaire. When I arrived at the theatre the line up was a mile long, up the stairs and through the student food court (so I was told… I didn’t actually go up the stairs to look). The lecture was sold out and the theatre accommodates over 1,000 people so you can imagine. And here I was expecting a couple hundred or something! Anyway, I went right to the front of the line and asked if I could sit at one of the spare chairs at the ticket-taking table by the door. No one argues with you when you have a cane and trouble walking, so I was seated right by the doors when they opened and snagged myself an awesome seat inside. Hee. Read the rest of this entry »

Many of you may not be aware about one of my biggest passions in life. It’s not very easy to put into one sentence, but it involves youth/teenagers, responsibility, support and independence. In other words, I get really excited when I meet a kid who comes from a shitty background, foster care, group homes etc., yet is hopeful for his/her future and takes responsibility for it. He/she has plans and ideas and is working towards shaping their future in a positive way instead of blaming their family or society for their problems and acting like they’re owed something. They make use of the programs put in place by our government to support and help them get on their feet and make a life for themselves in this big crazy world. I am 100% behind those programs being made available to these youth, but I’m 150% behind the kids that actually make use of them without abusing them.

When I meet this sort of youth, I want to be a part of their life. I want to support them in any way I can, encourage them and root for their success. I want to be someone they can turn to when they need a friend to talk to or are having a bad day.

One such person is Eric, who I have mentioned in here a few times before. He is an amazing kid. He’s almost 19 now and out of high school, living in his own apartment, working in a department store, and going to school two nights/week. He is finishing the courses he needs to get into the program he wants, and then he’ll go to the University of Lethbridge to get his final degree. He has it all planned out. In his “spare time” he also volunteers with the Youth in Care program and is an all-out activist for Youth in Care. He is AWESOME and such an amazing example of life after Foster Care.

Today I decided to sponsor a youth through the Youth Possibilities Program so he/she can attend a talk next Friday presented by the IPRA. They are trying to find sponsors to send 13 youth and 3 facilitators to see Senator Romeo Dallaire speak at the University.

When I read in my email request:

The Youth Possibilities Project of the Centre for Newcomers is a 6 month employment training program for immigrant & minority youth between the ages of 16 - 25. Most of the youth in this session are refugees that have been affected by war in countries such as Afghanistan and Sudan. It is not unfamiliar to our youth from El Salvador & Lebanon as well. As part of their training to either find gainful employment or go back to school, our youth commit to a community service project. This session our group chose to do forum theatre in conjunction with All Nations Theatre Society where they brought to light issues related to being an immigrant youth in Canada. I think it would be amazing for them to see Lt. Gen Dallaire speak. I hope you do consider this request.

I knew I wanted to help, but I also knew I needed to call someone. AH has a 22 year old nephew that lives at his house who is having trouble finding/keeping a job. I read a little more about this YPP program, and immediately called AH and asked “your nephew is unemployed, right?” and he said “yeah… always…” “Well, I found something he may qualify for” and told him about it. He said “yeah, he’s in that already, and he’s going to quit, he doesn’t like it…”

Oh man. AH needed to quickly hang up as he was about to get a client, so I am sitting here FUMING and wanting to wring a certain someone’s nephew’s little scrawny wimpy Middle Eastern neck.

Eric is working his ass off for $7.50 an hour at a department store and going to school and making something of his life. He has no family to fall back on (Dad is a child molester dickhead, mom is on welfare with two little ones and can’t take care of him). This YPP program, our government, our tax dollars, my money, pays AH’s nephew $7.50 an hour to learn how to find and keep a job and he’s not even trying?!? This kid (well, man actually) lives in AH’s house, because in his culture, family looks out for each other no matter what. When AH and his wife split up, she moved out of his house (back to her parents of course, where two other divorced sisters also reside) and his sister, brother and nephew moved in (mom was already there). You don’t charge family anything for rent. You live at home until you are married, and then go back home if the marriage doesn’t work (AH owns his own house though, so they all just moved in with him hehe).

So this nephew, at 22, is living for free off his dad and Uncle AH. I know for a fact that AH helps him out with all kinds of stuff and takes him places and gives him unlimited access to his computer which AH may just end up giving to him when he gets a new one. He will never be expected to pay rent and will be able to live with his family forever if he wants/needs to.

Okay, you know, I have tried to understand and respect AH’s culture and values. It is very different from mine, and just because I am not used to it, does not make it wrong. It is “their way” and if we are going to be friends, I need to keep my opinions to myself, have an open mind and respect these differences. But not in my own freakin’ BLOG I don’t!! That is BULLSHIT!! How is that nephew ever going to learn to be responsible and independent? What the hell reason does he need to get a job, if no matter what, family is going to take care of him?? Where does he get off abusing our Government’s money in programs designed to help him get on his feet? (Okay, that is a whole other can of worms that we won’t open here). If he was my nephew he would have one month to find a job and start paying me room and board or he would be out on his ass.

My sponsorship sure as hell better not be going to AH’s nephew.