Can You Hear Me Now?

i really do NOT like the new Facebook layout, so as such I’ve been spending a little more time snooping around Twitter. I deleted John Mayer from my following list; I decided I don’t really like him. Not my kind of person. Then I deleted Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore because they kinda bore me and re-tweet too much. I think I’m growing up!

I’m really behind on my blog! I blame my lack of energy and patience due to my lack of sleep. It’s been a rough couple of weeks again. If I have a couple nights where I sleep about 4 hours in a row, I get excited and think it’s improving, and then I go right back to sleepless nights and waking up every hour and maybe getting a total of 4 hours all broken up. I know a lot of it is mental, as I go to bed all anxious, stressed and worried that I won’t sleep again. I spent Sunday researching insomnia treatment and am putting a serious plan into action this week!

Last week I had an appointment with a physiatrist (mobility specialist) at the MS Clinic. I’m not sure what I was expecting, but I thought he’d want to see me walk and offer help to get me a lift in my shoe (over the years my right leg has become longer than my left, due to my uneven gait and, he says, my pelvis dropping because of it), or an Ankle/Foot Orthotic I can actually use (when I broke my wrist and was staying at the Care Center they made me an AFO to wear, that helps my right foot lift up when I walk, but I’ve never worn it because I can’t put it on without lots of help. At the care facility physiotherapists put it on me, and I/we assumed wrongly that I’d be able to put it on one-handed when my wrist healed. HA! I even bought two pairs of the same shoes in different sizes, but even with my brother’s help we couldn’t get it on me!) But that was not the case. He listened to me talk about the issues I’ve faced the past few years and kept shaking his head, “I don’t like what I’m hearing. I don’t like this at all.” That was useful. He asked me why I’m not living in a group home with round-the-clock care (thanks for your support) and told me I’m “melancholy and depressed” and referred me to a psychiatrist I’ve already seen. Well, maybe I wouldn’t be so melancholy if I was getting proper sleep! And seeing a psychiatrist who will want to put me on more drugs isn’t going to help. Well, it might for a little while, but not long term. He also referred me back to the same physiotherapy place I went to a few years ago (where they referred me back to the MS Clinic, but when I told him that he assured me I will get long-term physio there this time). One thing he said that I appreciated and agree with is that he believes a lot of my progression isn’t actual MS progression, it’s due to the broken bones, surgeries, being laid up, getting depressed, gaining weight… all that stuff. And how with regular physio and exercise I should be able to get some mobility back. Hence the referral to the clinic in the hospital close to me. I was told the therapist there used to be at the MS Clinic, and will work well with me, and get me a lift for my shoe if she thinks it will help. So, I hope I start soon, because daily exercise is a part of my Beat Insomnia Plan, and there isn’t a lot I can do on my own. Safely.

I also had a visit from my O/T with a power wheelchair. I wish I could renovate my apartment! I need the carpet and door frames removed from this place. I can’t get a power chair if I can’t get it in and out of the rooms in here, even though I need it mostly for going out. He’s supposed to bring another one to try soon, that turns corners tighter. I also need to write a stronger “client impact statement” so the government knows the chair is going to someone who really needs it, and will use it often, “contributing to the community”. I’m not sure how my medical appointments and physio contribute to the community, but if I can get out and about without needing to arrange appointments around when my dad can take me, I will think of other things. Um… I can go back to my “volunteer work in the arts community” (helping out my musician friends again by actually getting myself out to shows). I can make a nice list of the things I’ll be able to do and how often if that’s what they want.

There is big excitement in my family right now, with the arrival of my brother’s girlfriend from Mexico. Trust me, I want to gossip, but I cannot because everyone knows about this blog. Sigh. I’ll just say they met online, it’s a very interesting story I may be able to share one day in the future, (but probably not), and she’s great. She’s actually originally from Europe and speaks 5 or 6 languages fluently. She’s VERY interesting!

Michael J. Fox was on Oprah today. What an amazing attitude he has. I want to get back to that, too! I’m not as optimistic as I once was and that is a huge detriment to my life. I know it’s inside me, and can be persuaded out with a lot of money and pizza. Failing that, I need a) sleep, and b) a swift kick in the butt.

I have LOTS of work to do now. People are starting to get their info in to me and I’m back to being over run by receipts and taxes! Which is good because I need to pay the bills. So who knows when my next update will be. I hope you read this slow!

My brother has my camera so these photos are from my dad’s Blackberry. Comfy kitties.

This picture of Pepper makes me laugh for hours.

Dad didn’t use a flash because he didn’t want to “disturb” Pita. You know, the cat that disturbs EVERYONE.

I wanted to write about the last couple days I spent at that care facility and going in for surgery, before I forget stuff. I never want to forget how amazing some people in my life are and to never take for granted all the little things I can still do (especially once I can do them again!)

Tuesday night (July 25) is when I started feeling a little sick to my stomach, but I chalked it up to something that would be gone by morning and didn’t let it bother me. That was the day my friend Shawna was driving in from Winnipeg, and she arrived around 9:30 p.m. She came up to my room to say “hi” and get my keys. She was quite vibrant and energetic for someone who had just spent about 14 hours in her car! She looked great and very happy. Probably just happy to finally be here!

I gave her my keys and explained where all the cat stuff is and reminded her which cat is which (although, it’s pretty safe to say, “Pita is the one that will be all over you the second you walk in the door”) and wished her luck with her allergies. I told her if the cats drove her nuts, to sleep in my room with the door closed.

The next morning, I still felt sick but it wasn’t too, too bad… the nurses kept me in bed again and brought me breakfast, which I ate and probably shouldn’t have. By lunch time I could barely touch my food, which was sweet n’ sour meatballs and I really wanted them! I ate half a meatball and then switched to soda crackers and gingerale.

After lunch I headed for physio to get fitted for a new splint with velcro that I could easily pull on and off, and while there Kevin and Christine from the Pub came to visit. We hung out for awhile, and I told them I was leaving the next day, so Christine said she’d get some food ready for me and Kevin would drop it by on Friday, along with the two months of work they have sitting there for me.

After they left I crawled into bed, my tummy was really acting up by this time. I asked the nurses if they had anything for gas, because that is what I was so sure it was. I was given a Gravol and told they can’t give me anything else unless a doctor sees me and prescribes it. So, I can go to the store and buy my own Diovol or Pepto-Bismol or whatever and take it, but they can’t give me any because it’s not on my “PRN”. They’re so strict with that stuff - I am glad I had my own stash of vitamins and supplements they never knew about, or they would have been taken from me.

Anyway, Shawna glides into my room with some Tim Horton’s and Purdy’s chocolate for me!! I almost cried, because I was too sick to have any. Still thinking I had gas, I was wishing for some baking soda and water to burp it away. Before I knew it Shawna was asking where the nearest grocery store was, and she took off to get me some! What a sweetie. I took several doses of that and did get a few good burps out, but no relief. Shawna hung out with me for a few hours. Karen, my favourite RN, came on shift so we went out there to say hello.

Knowing it was my last night there, Karen had a “surprise” for me. She went down to her car to get it… and came back with this big basket she put together for me!!! It was in a tin pail that had sunflowers and a bee painted on it. Inside she put a sunflower bookmark, sunflower push pins, some candles, toffees and caramels, a nice smelling hair conditioner and a card. The card had a little silver kitty charm hanging on the front, and she wrote inside: “Gonna miss our talks together. I am really glad you are recovering well. Keep in touch, you are very special”. I was dumbfounded. I did not expect that!! Is it any wonder that she became my favourite from the night I arrived there at 2:00 a.m. and she did my intake report? We hit it off right away.

I was in bed early again, and Shawna left taking a bunch of stuff with her back to my apartment to lighten the morning’s load. I had trouble sleeping because I was in pain, so around 5:00 a.m. I begged for something. Karen phoned the doctor on call and he recommended some kind of medication that is for nausea and helps gas pain too. I had not been feeling nauseous (although I was wishing I could throw up, because maybe it would help!) I took the pill and it allowed the pain to subside enough to get a few hours sleep.

The next morning the nurses left me in bed again, but I got myself up and started organizing my stuff to go home. I felt sooooo sick. Bob arrived to take me home, so we packed everything, signed the discharge papers and left. I felt too sick to make a proper round of goodbyes… I figured I’d come back in a couple days when I was feeling better and say goodbye to Blanche and Clive and some of the staff I missed.

When we arrived at my apartment Shawna was nowhere to be seen, but her car was outside and my bedroom door was closed so I figured she was in there sleeping (it was about 10:00 am) . I settled in my La-Z-Boy for a bit and cuddled my kitties. I finally decided I needed my bed and would have to kick Shawna out. I knocked, waited, knocked again, waited, and then opened the door and she wasn’t even in there! I was quite puzzled. But too sick to really put any thought into it so I crawled into bed. Shortly after, Shawna walked in wearing shorts, a tank top and headphones… she had been out for a walk! Duh. Anyway, she was tired too so she went to lie down on the couch and we both tried to sleep.

By 4:00 I decided I better get myself to the hospital. I was only feeling worse, and this had gone on too long, it couldn’t be “just gas”. Shawna offered to drive me of course, but I figured arriving in an ambulance might get me in faster. (Wrong!) I called the non-emergency ambulance line and they sent the EMT and paramedics. They helped me on to the ambulance, put in an IV (taking my one good vein on my right hand!), took my vitals, etc. To get me from the ambulance into the hospital they used one of these hard white plastic wheelchairs that are terribly uncomfortable. Once inside, the emergency paperwork was taken care of without me needing to stand in a line, but then I was placed in the waiting room with everyone else to wait my turn. Okay, okay, I guess “tummy troubles” isn’t exactly more of an emergency than “brain bleeding” so FINE. I will wait.

And wait and wait and wait. In that hard plastic chair. I was so uncomfortable and in so much pain and sooo tired and three hours had passed (this is the same waiting room a woman recently suffered a miscarriage while waiting) that I figured I may as well go home and be in pain there, at least I could lie down. I called Shawna to come get me and just as she walked in they called my name. Perfect timing! So Shawna was there to hang out with me while I was tested and seen by a doctor and stuff. On a side note, I was so tired and out of it I didn’t even notice how HOT the doctor was until later, when my pain had subsided a bit. Then I looked at Shawna and was like “woah, he is CUTE!” and she said “I was wondering when you were going to notice that!” She just kept shaking her head because all the doctors sent my way were cute. Hehe! They figured it was my gallbladder, and wanted to admit me for more tests in the morning. I slept on the emergency cot until a bed became available at around 1:30 a.m. and they put me in a room.

The following morning I was wheeled down for an ultrasound. I was introduced to a student and told she would be doing it. That was fine with me, however, she took 3 times as long as any other pelvic ultrasound I have ever had, and all that pressing down on my painful parts almost brought me to tears. It was an hour and 20 minutes of sheer torture. After she was finished, I breathed a huge sigh of relief and then another technician came in and said “okay, my turn!” He had to do everything over again to make sure the student didn’t miss anything. THEN I did cry. Just a slight whimper but I was tired and stressed and in pain… at least he only took about 20 minutes.

Then it was back upstairs where I was immediately jumped on for another attempt at drawing blood (a lab tech had failed earlier… my damn veins!) This one’s attempts were worst than the first and she poked me and shoved the needle around in my arm to the point that I screamed, made her jump, which hurt me more, and soon I was all out crying and hyperventilating. I guess it was the fact I had just been subjected to two hours of intense pain and was tired and stressed and this threw me over the edge. So they left me alone for awhile and didn’t attempt to get blood again for several hours.

The doctor came by and told me, yes, indeed, my gallbladder is very inflamed and needs to come out. Since the chances were fairly good I would not be getting surgery that afternoon, he allowed me “fluids only” until 6:00 p.m. (you can get called for surgery at any time of the day or night, and you can’t have anything in your system!). So I started drinking water, and when Shawna arrived I sent her right back down to get me a coffee lol They brought me a supper tray - a popsicle, jell-o, vegetable broth, tea. It was Friday afternoon and the last time I had eaten was soda crackers on Wednesday afternoon, so bring on the jell-o!

From 6:00 p.m. on I was not allowed anything, and was finally called for surgery the following night at 6:00 p.m. 24 hours without so much as a glass of water! I was back in my room close to midnight and was given a popsicle. Mmmmm. The next couple days were kinda like that, all fluids. When they finally brought me a roast beef sandwich for lunch on Tuesday, I just about cried! It was the best sandwich EVER. (Totally not, but it seemed like it at the time).

As mentioned in another entry, my MS meds block narcotics so no pain killers helped, yet they kept pumping them in me to see if I could get some relief. It didn’t work. It was hell! The first day after surgery I was hooked up to a catheter THANK GOD because I would have rather killed myself than try to get up for the bathroom. I was in so much pain it hurt to breathe and the nurses kept FORCING me to take deep breathes to prevent pneumonia or a collapsed lung (while in surgery they turn off your lungs and the machines breathe for you, filling your lungs with phlegm, so it is very important to cough that up and work your lungs back into breathing mode!)

Anyway, I was in the hospital about a week, much longer that usual “day surgery” gallbladder removal patients. Shawna left a couple days before I was discharged, but while in my apartment she unpacked my stuff, fed my cats, etc. She had to spend the last few days in a hotel because she was ready to scratch her nose off by that point. Lisa and Russ continued to take care of my kitties after Shawna left, and AH came by to visit me and get keys back as well. He needed to take over that weekend shift (and even brought his kids and made his son clean the litter boxes… he has been bugging his parents for a cat, but that cured him! “Dad, it SMELLS!” “Finish it!” “But it STINKS!” “I don’t care, you finish it! This is what you have to do with a cat!”) Hehe

I was then sent to my mom’s where I stayed for a week, feeling completely helpless and pathetic. I could barely walk, I was in pain, I couldn’t do anything for myself and at that point I wasn’t even able to get myself to the bathroom in time so I was wearing Depends at night. Yes, you heard me, I admit it! I would just sit there and cry every day, I was so depressed and hated my life. It’s like, over the years I have gotten used to my limitations and what I can and cannot do. I have learned to live with it and am okay with it. But take that and make it 10 times worse, and I am one depressed and grumpy bitch. THAT I don’t want to live with and get used to, it ain’t gonna happen, that is too much to ask of me at this point… My friends Jay and Katrina drove out to visit me one evening and brought me trashy gossip rags, which cheered me up a little. Talking on the phone with my friends helped, and knowing Rob would be here soon helped… I just prayed I would be in better shape by the time he got here.

Luckily, I only needed the Depends for a few nights… that was the first amplified MS symptom to go away. I got to the point where I could wash myself (but not shower) and dress (in sweats and a T-shirt, no bra!) and by the time I moved back home I wasn’t much better than that, but I knew I would get better faster at home and being forced to walk around more and get stuff for myself. Rob arrived the day after I got home, and the rest you’ve read about.

Oh yeah, that ambulance ride?? Who knew - I was sent a bill for $364.00 or something. Holy cripes! My health insurance covers it but I guess they never got that info so I called them to re-bill. I had no IDEA it cost that much though!!

Next up, I need to write about yesterday!! But my wrist needs a big ‘ol rest first.

Hi Everyone! I’m posting an update for Donna from her computer. So Wednesday she wasn’t feeling good and then on Thursday when she came home she felt even worse. After trying everything to feel better she finally thought she should go to the hospital. The verdict…..inflamed Gall Bladder! So she is currently in the hospital awaiting surgery and she asked that I post an update in her absence. So there you have it. She finally gets to go home only to go back to the hospital! Hopefully she’ll be feeling better soon.

Around 3:00 a.m. the night nurse came in to re-stock towels by my sink. Knowing it would be my last chance to see her (she’s not working tonight), I called her over so we could have a proper goodbye. We chatted for a few minutes, I thanked her for all her help, etc. and then she left my room, never to be seen again. Or so I thought.

I realized I had to pee, very badly. So I did my usual… raised the bed up so it’s easier to stand, then stand up, and then I was to get in my wheelchair and roll into the bathroom. But instead, when I stood up my left ankle decided to give out on me, so I landed back on the bed… except just the very edge of the bed, and then I slid onto the floor. I swear I didn’t feel a thing and don’t really know how it happened exactly, but there I was, sitting on the floor next to my bed.

I was trying to figure out if there was a way I could get up by myself, but no go. I needed to turn onto my knees and would not be able to do that without using my wrist because the bed was too high. So I rang the bell for the nurse. I still had to pee, really badly now, so while waiting I remembered the bed pan was in the bottom drawer behind me. I pulled it out, stuck it under me, and let it go.

The nurse I had just said my big farewell to walked in, saw me sitting on the floor with a pan of pee under me and a chesire grin on my face. The look on her face was, to say the least, priceless.

Anyway, with the help of another nurse and a transfer belt we got me up without any trouble. I just needed the bed lowered so I could climb on it, really! Just as I was all snuggled up to go back to sleep, the nurse came in again to take my blood pressure and vitals because, you know, if anything out of the ordinary happens they need to make sure you’re not all of a sudden at death’s door!

I’m fine, I will live, don’t worry mom!

Today started off badly. I skipped oatmeal this morning and decided to get Corn Flakes instead. I asked for the soy milk, which poured out so thick and slow I knew it had gone bad!! The dietician insisted the “best before” date was August 10, but I pointed out that is the date you can leave it in the cupboard unopened. Once you open it, it’s not good for any longer than a week or so in the fridge! I was told they would get another container, so I asked for more cereal but the milk never came. Then, we got French Toast… and mine was so cold, and the sausages (which I don’t like anyway) were so cold and wrinkly it was gross! I opted for plain toast and peanut butter instead. So breakfast was a bust and there was all this wasted food at my table.

After breakfast I skipped exercise class so I could hang out with Elaine before she got picked up at 10:00. I helped her pack up all her clothes and stuff and tried not to cry! I am going to miss her so much. I have never met anyone with such a positive outlook on life no matter what happens, especially considering her age. She can find humour in everything from her incontinence to her bowel movements (”you’ve got a big hard block in there today,” the nurse said as she inserted the suppository. “Well, you can have it!” said Elaine. “I’ll wrap it up in a big bow.”) She has no regrets that she never married and dedicated her adult life/retirement years to looking after her mother until she died. She says if she could do it over again, she would not change a thing. She notices every little detail about the sky, the clouds, the trees and the beauty of what surrounds us. She thinks it is a miracle when she sees a bird fly. Every little thing is something to be grateful for and to appreciate. She is truly an inspiration and everyone should spend a day with her!

Her sister-in-law picked her up, and I helped take stuff out to the car in my wheelchair. I gave Elaine a big hug and promised to come visit her. She wished me all the happiness in the world, and said how nice it was to meet my mom and Bob. Then she took my hand, looked me in the eyes and said “and say hello, and goodbye, to AH”. I think she took quite a liking to him too!

Then she was gone, and my room seems so empty now. Even though we often both just lied there or sat there and read without speaking, just knowing she was there and would most likely make me laugh at any moment was a comfort.

Anyway, the rest of the day was better. I met with the O.T. who is going to make me a splint tomorrow that I can easily slide on and off. I need to wear it most of the time so I don’t overwork my wrist, and especially when I walk. The last thing I need is a little stumble where I reach out my hand and press it against a wall like I usually do to balance myself. She also showed me a catalogue of allllll kinds of kitchen gadgets for one-handed people. I can get special dishes and cutting boards and knives and all kinds of things to help me out in that area. I didn’t see prices on anything, but I know they are available at all medical supply stores so I’ll have to take a look around.

Tonight’s dinner was yummy, roast beef with mashed potatoes, gravy and corn. I love that kind of food, I’m a meat and potatoes starchy gal. Tomorrow’s meals are great too, a nice send off for me. Sweet n’ sour meatballs at lunch, and BBQ chicken with roast potatoes for supper. And dessert? My favourite ultra chocolatey fudgy brownie.

Dinner conversation was interesting. Clive is upset because they told him again that the senior’s living centre his wife moved into cannot accommodate him because his needs are too high, he has gone “too far downhill”. Blanche insisted that he could turn his health around and be in tip top shape in 6 months. “There is hope for you, Clive. Donna, there is definitely hope for you. There isn’t any hope left for me, I’m finished”. She is so serene about it all. “I’m in the final stages of COPD and my heart is weak. I am ready to die anyway, I have no one left to be with and take care of me (since her husband is too far gone).” She totally accepts it. She talked again about how full her life was and how much she enjoyed life with her husband. She told me she wishes that for me, that I will find someone to spend my life with. Me too! She wants me to have kids, though, because “you will be a great mom. Don’t take that away from some lucky kid.” That is sweet and all, but unless I adopt an older child someday or end up with a widower with one perfect little girl man with kids, it won’t happen!

Anyway, I don’t see that Clive has hope for getting into tip top shape considering his age and multiple health conditions. You should see the pail ‘o pills he takes every morning!! It’s insane. I don’t know how all those drugs know where to go in your body to treat what. I bet some of them are to counter the side effects of others!!

Tomorrow is my last full day here. I’ll find out if I can get Home Care to help me shower and dress every morning when I get out (otherwise, Shawna’s going to be doing much more than she bargained for! Heehee). I’m also meeting with Lorraine, the Rec. Therapist, to go over different programs offerred by the MS Society and my “leisure needs”. I know there is a lot out there, but unless you want to spend your day in an Access Calgary vehicle (which is only okay with me if it is AH at the wheel!) they’re not always worth it. But I would love to hear what she has found for me. The O.T. has also put in a request for me to attend regular physio sessions either at a hospital near me, or downstairs in this building. I see exercise in my future again!

The countdown is on!

Our Occupational Therapist has been working with me and my wrist a lot, giving me exercises and testing my strength and stuff. The other day she gave me some yellow putty to squeeze and stretch with my fingers. She asked me to make some things… “make a cow. A bird. A teepee!” So I start shaping a teepee, and it’s not exactly looking like a teepee. I laugh, “Now I am making fallic symbols. I have been here far too long!! She HOWLED.

The past couple days have been typically quiet for me around here… resting, eating, physio, etc. No exciting visitors or anything.

So, this afternoon I am sitting on my bed reading a magazine when the Unit Clerk brought me the phone. It was my friend Shawna in Winnipeg, who has been calling regularly. This time, she was calling because she read that I’ll be home Thursday, and she wants to drive out to be my personal slave for a visit! At first I was a little hesitant, because I will be overwhelmed with work and kitties all over me, plus just simply trying to heal, but as the idea sunk in I liked it a lot. I do have piles of work to do (considering I’ve missed 6 weeks, plus the usual quarterly GST returns are due July 31) but having another person around will be great. For company, and she said she doesn’t mind helping me out a bit. Even to help with meals; and with her car, we won’t be stuck at home 100% of the time! We can visit air conditioned places. So she plans to arrive sometime tomorrow night and will come get my keys, and go to my apartment. My kitties are meeting soooo many different people that are wandering into my place! My apartment has never seen so much action, I should leave more often! Poor Shawna is allergic to cats, but hopefully she won’t be too bad… she can take Benadryl and sleep in my room with the door closed until I get home, and then we’ll see how she’s feeling.

Elaine returns to her Lodge tomorrow. I am REALLY going to miss her, I love that woman. I gave her my number and said unless I hear differently, I will assume she is at that lodge and will visit her there. And I will, for sure!!

Anyway, my feet are still puffy and I am trying to drink lots of water and keep them up as much as possible. So, I’m off to do some more of that. Cya!

Ahhh yesterday was a wonderful day! I got to stay in bed a little later because there are too many people for the nurses to get up and dressed by 8:30 on my side, and I said I didn’t care if I missed breakfast since I was going out with my folks soon. The nurse said she’d be back later to help me dress, but while everyone was off in the dining room and I was on my own clock, I slowly got myself up, washed and dressed by about 9:00. I wheeled myself downstairs to get a good coffee fr0m the machine, and then came back up to the dining room to say “hi” to Blanche and Clive. Our nurse saw me and gasped “who got you up??” I said “I don’t need YOU! I don’t need anybody!” hehe

My parents picked me up at 10:00 a.m. and we packed up some stuff to go home that I won’t need my last few days here. Then we headed to the chiropractor and he worked on my shoulders, arms and wrist a little bit. Bob bought me a muffin and coffee because I missed breakfast. Then we were home to my hot apartment. This is the first time I have been back that I wasn’t wearing a cast or splint on my wrist. As soon as I sat down, Pita jumped up on my lap, wrapped all four of her legs around my left forearm, and started licking my wrist. I looked at my mom in amazement. She just would not let go of that arm/hand and was licking and nibbling at it like crazy. It was adorable. Cats are so intuitive. I just kept telling them, “purr on my wrist! Purr on my wrist!”

I got my shower and decided I will definitely need Home Care for awhile to help with that. At least helping me get out of the shower, I can’t stand up from my shower bench alone. Melanie (from my client Troy’s office) dropped off some work which I added to the growimg pile of things I need to do when I get home!

To escape the heat and have a nice dinner, we headed for the air conditioned Olive Garden around 4:00 (early enough to miss the line-ups!) We took our time and ate and drank and ate and ate and, I do believe, ate some more. It was soooo good and I came back here at 7:00 ready to burst! No evening cookies for me.

So, I learned I am “banned from sitting around the desk” LOL Oh my GOD. The reason is that I seem to know too much about the goings on of other patients and I hear too much sitting there. That cracks me up! I figure some staff must have found my blog or something. If they think it is because I hang around the desk, they are so wrong! I yak with staff at the desk because I like them. We talk about men and relationships, mostly. Work. Life. Whatever. Everything I hear about patients I hear because I have good hearing! Whether I am in my room, in the lounge, in the dining room… my ears are sharper than most people in this place, and ALL the staff talk. A lot. Either to each other, or yes, to me sometimes. Not to mention how the other patients talk about what they have heard staff say about other staff and patients lol And if I write about it in here, so what?? I haven’t talked about half of what I have heard. I have never mentioned the name of the place I am staying at, most of the names are aliases or “the nurse”, and stats show me 95% of the people who read this don’t know me outside of this blog and probably couldn’t even point out Calgary on a map. I am not going to apologize for having good hearing, being someone others vent to and is easy to talk to, or writing about my thoughts and memories from here! I’m not hurting anybody and if I am, they can talk to me directly.

Last night I told Karen (who was working, yaaaay, but I was too tired to hang out with her, boooo) to make sure the morning staff knew that I want a lazy Sunday. I’d had two days being out and about, and I need a day to be lazy. So no one bothered me in the morning and I stayed in bed until about 10:30. Then I got dressed, got a coffee, and then it was almost time for lunch. Which was a waffle with peaches and whipped cream and some bacon, so close enough to breakfast for me! Tonight’s supper is my favourite, turkey and mashed potatoes, so I’m going to go lay down and daydream about that.

Random Notes ~

• When Elaine goes home on Tuesday, she is on a 48 hour pass to start with, so that means her bed will be held, and that means I will have a private room my last couple nights here!
• Bob is picking me up Thursday morning, so that is when I go home!!!
• The room next door has a big old man who sort of howls and wails all the time… either he is in pain or it is just his way of getting stuff out. Elaine said “my God, he sounds like a chicken trying to lay a square egg!” LOL
• I had a dream that I asked for a straw (as I often do when a cup is heavy) and was told there are no more. Anywhere. In the world.
• Clive doesn’t eat any fowl, including soups made with a chicken broth base. When I asked him why, he mumbled something about London and the War and bombings and slaughtering geese and chickens and that is all they had to eat. So at meal time when they place three desserts at the table, one for each of us, I usually get to mine first… if it is cake Clive will ask me what kind it is, and I answer “chicken cake”, hoping he will give me his. It hasn’t worked yet.
• I’m still hearing lots of positive long marriage stories from staff and patients
• Jerry (the man I mentioned in this entry) went missing yesterday. He just left, and hasn’t been since since. I heard him paged, followed by the code yellow (missing patient!) and he’s just gone. He was homeless and suffered from dementia before, so that’s probably where he is again… off getting drunk somewhere, I’m sure.
• Karen works again tonight. I am going to try to have the energy to hang out with her for awhile. And make sure the conversation sticks to subjects that are okay for us to talk about… like my bowel movements.

Whew, what a day! It’s a hot one out there. And I actually got to enjoy it!

Around 12:30 my friend Andrea came by to take me to meet her husband and friends at the Saskatoon Farm. First she had me change into some clothes she brought with her - some capri pants and a really nice top that she bought for herself and decided she didn’t want, so I get them! Good deal. She is a shop-o-holic and my size and I love her for it! Then we were off for the day.

I was in my wheelchair, and the farm isn’t the most accessible place, but we managed. Andrea knows the owners too so she gets a “friends and family” discount. There were so many things that I wanted to buy, but I kept it around $40. Andrea and Roger treated us to lunch. I had a Saskatoon berry & lemon muffin, yogurt and fruit (lots of melons and berries) because I knew I was getting dessert and didn’t want to overdo it! I tried this layered lemon dessert that was amazing and topped with more Saskatoon berries so I didn’t miss out on those.

After lunch and shopping, we sat in their outdoor cafe and had iced cappuccinos. The farm’s pets (dogs, pig, cat) roam freely about there. The pig wouldn’t leave us alone and drove us crazy lol After an hour or so, I was the party pooper because I could not handle the heat anymore, even though we were in the shade. I was in dire need of air conditioning so they threw me in the truck and turned it on high!

Andrea brought me back up here by 6:00, and there was a Tim Horton’s coffee sitting on my table. Turns out AH was here to see me at about 2:30. Oops! He was all “well, if you had answered your phone!” but the restaurant was too noisy and I didn’t hear it ring!

I picked up four Saskatoon berry tarts, easier to share around here than cutting a pie. I gave one to Elaine and one to Blanche and I will have the other two, thankyouverymuch!

Yesterday’s Notes ~

• On my way over here, the Rec. Aide handed me a little bag tied with a ribbon filled with chocolates as I passed her in the hallway. Awww.
• My brother came to visit after dinner and we hung out for a couple hours.
• Elaine isn’t going to a nursing home (at this point)! I think the staff rallied for her. She is going back to her Lodge on Tuesday for a month to see how it goes. Then they will see if she needs more round-the-clock care.
• There is a woman who volunteers in the store downstairs who broke her wrist around the same time as me (we both had the fluorescent orange casts). She is now in a splint like mine, although I’m not wearing mine anymore. When she saw my bare arm, no more bruises or anything, she gasped “why does it look so good? It looks totally normal and you can do so much with it! Mine doesn’t look like that. What did you do?!?” I told her I meditated and visualized it better and now she wants me to teach her lol
• I am going home either Wednesday night or Thursday morning, depending on when I can get a ride!