Can You Hear Me Now?

I guess I’m accident prone. Lots of people are using their Facebook Notes section to fill out those little surveys that go around, and many of them have questions like “Have you ever ridden in an ambulance? Have you ever had stitches? Have you ever had surgery?” And most people are all, “no, no, no”. WHAT?? Is that possible? I’m all “oh, hell yeah, I can’t count how many times!!” Geez. I actually do consider myself a lucky person overall, but those of you that have never needed an ambulance or surgery and have never had a broken bone or anything, you are some lucky people.

Speaking of being lucky, how about that couple in Ontario who won $32 million in the lottery, and while they were driving to Winnipeg to pick up their winnings, they bought a scratch and win ticket, and won another $10 million? I kid you not. It was on the morning news yesterday, but you think I can find a link?? No. You just have to believe me. How do I get me some of THAT lucky energy??

Speaking of accident prone, I fell the other day and landed smack on my tailbone. Many of you probably know how much that hurts, and since I cracked my tailbone when I was 14, it has always been a sensitive area. Anyway, my chiropractor has been away, so I’ve just had to wait it out. In the meantime, not getting treatment for that I believe led to pulling a muscle somehere around my ribs on my right side yesterday (while doing nothing strange - just drying myself off after my shower - it’s like it was just sitting there, waiting for me to turn that way or something) and now I am in SO MUCH PAIN, every move is agony. I will finally get to see my chiropractor tomorrow and he will fix me up, but until then I’m living on Tylenol while hunched over grabbing my ribs or lying down with a heating pad. I am soooore.

Robyn tagged the hundreds and thousands of people who read her journal, so since that includes me, I have been tagged! I’m going to try to think of things you don’t already know about me if you’ve been reading a long time, so this may be “Seven Things about my Past and Juicy Gossip”.

1. The oldest single I own was autographed by two of the members who wrote/played on it, almost 20 years later! Here’s the story. My first ever ‘45 single was “Boogie Oogie Oogie” by Taste of Honey (1978). Many years ago, I was working at a local talent agency and re-organizing their band files. I came across one for a “Don Johnson” whom I had met years before that, when he was playing drums at a gig with Steve Pineo. I read his file, and it turned out he had been the drummer for Taste of Honey. I thought that was cool, that he lived here now. In the mid-90’s, when I was doing accounting for a pub called the Unicorn, Don Johnson was coming in to sing with his new band. I came down that night and brought my single to get it autographed. He signed it and then told me “Perry Kibble is here, too” (another former Taste of Honey member and co-writer of the song). So I met Perry, and he also signed the single. I think that is so cool. Full circle moment. NB: Perry Kibble died a couple years later in 1999 of heart failure at the age of 49.
2. I used to work for the (Famous One Or Two Hit-Wonder Band That Shall Not Be Named). They used to own a chain of pubs across Canada and I worked at the Head Office, doing payroll and all kinds of stuff. After they fired the Best Accountant Ever who then Sued Them and Won, I took over most of her job as well, and worked there for as long as I could until I ethically could no longer take it. After I returned from a business trip to Toronto where I really saw Mr. CEO’s true colours and what my “options” were if I wanted to move up in the company, I quit. (Not the FOOTHWBTSNBN’s fault - they were nice guys, but not being involved in the day-to-day business, they weren’t aware what an asshole the CEO they hired was, and everyone was afraid to say anything because the Best Accountant Ever was fired after 35 years of service when SHE tried to say something). After I left, the Truth came out, (because… WHY would Donna leave?? There must be something going on…) and that CEO was fired. I then received calls at home from FOOTHWBTSNBN, begging my return (lalalalala! I rock!) but I was still unhappy with the people they chose to continue running the business and didn’t return, except to come in on Saturdays to help out the one person I DID like in the company (the new accountant) and she paid me big bucks to do so. But after a few months she had seen enough as well and was going to leave, and so I never returned, and shortly after that the main pub they owned in Calgary mysteriously shut down and the company went into receivership. NB: The FOOTHWBTSNBN are still milking the one or two hits they had in the 60’s and 70’s for all they are worth and keep releasing “Best Of” compilations and touring.
3. I once walked out on a job I stayed at for 6 weeks, which was the most pathetic working environment since FOOTHWBTSNBN, by going in at 8:00 in the morning, leaving an “I quit this bullshit” note on my boss’s chair, and going home before she even came in.
4. I used to work with a Freak Side Show. I really just sold tickets and worked the concession stand and helped with promo, but occasionally during rehearsals I would try different things, and I’ve done fire eating and tongue transfers with fire. When the show had to close its Calgary location, all the props (such as the 2 headed calf, creepy things in jars, the haunted Dummy) and carnival-like decor were stored in the basement of the house I lived in.
5. One of the stars of that Freak Side Show, the Impaler (he stuck long needles through various parts of his body and hung fish hooks from his chest, and he really did it… it wasn’t a trick… the guy was into being “tortured” and liked pain… his hero was Fakir Musafar) (do not click that if you have a weak stomach) was my room mate for awhile. He was 19 at the time. He pierced his own penis in our basement one evening. We had visitors, and were like… “don’t go downstairs!” When he was finished, he came upstairs as if nothing was any different, just another day. A few weeks later he took the piercing out when he was sleeping on a hide-a-bed at his parent’s place, and the ring at the end of his penis sort of slipped over a piece of metal at the side of the bed and hooked itself there, and he rolled over….

   Okay, I know, all you guys are hugging your privates right now, feeling his pain. Sorry. Some of these have very little do with things about ME, but I’m having fun reminiscing! Hehe But this is taking too long so the last two will be short and simple.

6. My biggest pet peeve is gum chewing or the sound of someone’s saliva smacking in their mouth. If you are anywhere near my ears and chewing gum or eating (and are a saliva smacker when you do it), then I am going to FREAK out and will try my best to do that politely and leave the room if I am able. But nothing makes me shiver with disgust more than that. Sometimes I’ll be beside a cab driver who is chewing gum, and I want to scream!!!
7. I always get excited about receiving, opening and reading my fortune cookie after a Chinese food meal, even though I don’t believe a single word of those at ALL.

If you’re reading this, consider yourself tagged as well, to write Seven Things about Yourself. You’re then supposed to tag seven people, but do whatever you want!