Can You Hear Me Now?

Today started off badly. I skipped oatmeal this morning and decided to get Corn Flakes instead. I asked for the soy milk, which poured out so thick and slow I knew it had gone bad!! The dietician insisted the “best before” date was August 10, but I pointed out that is the date you can leave it in the cupboard unopened. Once you open it, it’s not good for any longer than a week or so in the fridge! I was told they would get another container, so I asked for more cereal but the milk never came. Then, we got French Toast… and mine was so cold, and the sausages (which I don’t like anyway) were so cold and wrinkly it was gross! I opted for plain toast and peanut butter instead. So breakfast was a bust and there was all this wasted food at my table.

After breakfast I skipped exercise class so I could hang out with Elaine before she got picked up at 10:00. I helped her pack up all her clothes and stuff and tried not to cry! I am going to miss her so much. I have never met anyone with such a positive outlook on life no matter what happens, especially considering her age. She can find humour in everything from her incontinence to her bowel movements (”you’ve got a big hard block in there today,” the nurse said as she inserted the suppository. “Well, you can have it!” said Elaine. “I’ll wrap it up in a big bow.”) She has no regrets that she never married and dedicated her adult life/retirement years to looking after her mother until she died. She says if she could do it over again, she would not change a thing. She notices every little detail about the sky, the clouds, the trees and the beauty of what surrounds us. She thinks it is a miracle when she sees a bird fly. Every little thing is something to be grateful for and to appreciate. She is truly an inspiration and everyone should spend a day with her!

Her sister-in-law picked her up, and I helped take stuff out to the car in my wheelchair. I gave Elaine a big hug and promised to come visit her. She wished me all the happiness in the world, and said how nice it was to meet my mom and Bob. Then she took my hand, looked me in the eyes and said “and say hello, and goodbye, to AH”. I think she took quite a liking to him too!

Then she was gone, and my room seems so empty now. Even though we often both just lied there or sat there and read without speaking, just knowing she was there and would most likely make me laugh at any moment was a comfort.

Anyway, the rest of the day was better. I met with the O.T. who is going to make me a splint tomorrow that I can easily slide on and off. I need to wear it most of the time so I don’t overwork my wrist, and especially when I walk. The last thing I need is a little stumble where I reach out my hand and press it against a wall like I usually do to balance myself. She also showed me a catalogue of allllll kinds of kitchen gadgets for one-handed people. I can get special dishes and cutting boards and knives and all kinds of things to help me out in that area. I didn’t see prices on anything, but I know they are available at all medical supply stores so I’ll have to take a look around.

Tonight’s dinner was yummy, roast beef with mashed potatoes, gravy and corn. I love that kind of food, I’m a meat and potatoes starchy gal. Tomorrow’s meals are great too, a nice send off for me. Sweet n’ sour meatballs at lunch, and BBQ chicken with roast potatoes for supper. And dessert? My favourite ultra chocolatey fudgy brownie.

Dinner conversation was interesting. Clive is upset because they told him again that the senior’s living centre his wife moved into cannot accommodate him because his needs are too high, he has gone “too far downhill”. Blanche insisted that he could turn his health around and be in tip top shape in 6 months. “There is hope for you, Clive. Donna, there is definitely hope for you. There isn’t any hope left for me, I’m finished”. She is so serene about it all. “I’m in the final stages of COPD and my heart is weak. I am ready to die anyway, I have no one left to be with and take care of me (since her husband is too far gone).” She totally accepts it. She talked again about how full her life was and how much she enjoyed life with her husband. She told me she wishes that for me, that I will find someone to spend my life with. Me too! She wants me to have kids, though, because “you will be a great mom. Don’t take that away from some lucky kid.” That is sweet and all, but unless I adopt an older child someday or end up with a widower with one perfect little girl man with kids, it won’t happen!

Anyway, I don’t see that Clive has hope for getting into tip top shape considering his age and multiple health conditions. You should see the pail ‘o pills he takes every morning!! It’s insane. I don’t know how all those drugs know where to go in your body to treat what. I bet some of them are to counter the side effects of others!!

Tomorrow is my last full day here. I’ll find out if I can get Home Care to help me shower and dress every morning when I get out (otherwise, Shawna’s going to be doing much more than she bargained for! Heehee). I’m also meeting with Lorraine, the Rec. Therapist, to go over different programs offerred by the MS Society and my “leisure needs”. I know there is a lot out there, but unless you want to spend your day in an Access Calgary vehicle (which is only okay with me if it is AH at the wheel!) they’re not always worth it. But I would love to hear what she has found for me. The O.T. has also put in a request for me to attend regular physio sessions either at a hospital near me, or downstairs in this building. I see exercise in my future again!